


at least kiss me just to shut me up!

by fools_mp3



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: #asian-american nct, Alternate Universe - College/University, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining, Roommates, actually sickening, donghyuck: jeno has Arms.. two of them, so domestic that it makes me SICK, the good ol diaspora experience, they're domestic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-18
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-09-06 05:20:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20286067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fools_mp3/pseuds/fools_mp3
Summary: Donghyuck’s roommate Jeno is a health freak (“I prefer health enthusiast,” Jeno interjects.) and it’s making Donghyuck lose his mind.(Or, roommates Donghyuck and Jeno and how they fall in love.)





	at least kiss me just to shut me up!

**Author's Note:**

> the absolute nohyuck content drought press F to pay respects
> 
> _the crowd:_ FffffFff fFf Ff F
> 
> (anyways, i hope i can contribute at least like half an oreo to this ship!)
> 
> lets get this warnings/disclaimer bread:
> 
>   * in case u didn't read the tags, this isn't set in korea. they're in california, second year of uni and Yes this is 100% me just projecting myself into them as a CA asian
>     * also cus nohyuck UCSB roommates. a dream
>     * best friends renhyuck. best friends nomin.
>     * _**side ships:**_ markren, yukhei/jaemin dude is it jus me or this ship is so rare i dont even know what theyre called this is so sad PRESSSSSS F, dojae is mentioned for like 2 seconds
>       * as u can see im into dreamie rarepairs
> 
> three songs that inspired this work:
> 
>     * lover, taylor swift
>     * teenage dream, katy perry
>     * it's not living (if it's not with you), the 1975
> 
> sorry for this long intro but i really do have to say, lastly:
> 
> this is for:
> 
>   1. kaya... my sweet 🍞. my honeybun! thank you for beta-ing this fic & holding my hand throughout this whole thing; for holding my hand throughout ANY nohyuck thing literally ever... i am so glad i have found you in that horrible chaotic app (twitter) and i hope we can continue like this for a long time <3
>   2. yuwon... my sweet buttercup you are the apple of my eye my renjun to my donghyuck; thank you for inspiring this whole fic w/ the conversation abt asian-american NCT & roommates nohyuck that kickstarted our whole friendship!
> 
> i hope you enjoy!

**donghyuck ** [12:32am] **: **ok so what if i said i possibly liked jeno  
**donghyuck ** [12:32am] **: **like hypothetically though  
**donghyuck **[12:33am]: in like a hypothetical alternate universe  
**donghyuck **[12:35am]: renjun i am in a crisis.,  
**donghyuck **[12:35am]: well alternate universe donghyuck is in a crisis  
**renjun ** [12:42am] **: **it is almsot 1 am hyuck  
**donghyuck ** [12:42am] **: **lets not pretend u r sleeping as if ur not sucking face w mark  
**renjun ** [12:43m] **: **hmm ok goodnight  
**donghyuck ** [12:43am] **: **reeeeenjun  
**donghyuck ** [12:44am] **: **renjuuuuun   
**donghyuck ** [12:44am] **: **come back king  
**renjun ** [12:46am] **: **im only back cus mark refuses 2 make out w me again until u stop blowing up my phone  
**renjun ** [12:46am] **: **how can i help u Donghyuck  
**donghyuck ** [12:46am] **: **ok. hypothetically. if i liked jeno. what would u say  
**renjun ** [12:47am] **: **i would hypothetically say can u tell me something thats at least a little bit surprising to keep me on my toes  
**donghyuck ** [12:47am] **: **renjun  
**donghyuck ** [12:47am] **: **i mean Like like  
**donghyuck ** [12:48am] **: **i Like like jeno  
**renjun ** [12:49am] **: **donghyuck we are college sophomores  
**renjun ** [12:49am] **: **“Like like” are u srs  
**donghyuck ** [12:50am] **: **ok watv. u know wat i mean. In Like W Jeno. the whole 9 yards  
**renjun ** [12:50am] **: **i would Still say can u tell me smthn surprising 2 keep me on my toes  
**donghyuck ** [12:51am] **: **hmmm ok  
**donghyuck ** [12:51am] **: **well non hypothetically Renjun Im In Like W Jeno  
**renjun ** [12:51am] **: **hmmm well non hypothetically Hyuck Can U Tell Something Thats At Least A Lil Bit Surprising 2 Keep Me On My Toes  
**donghyuck ** [12:52am] **: **thank u so much renjun. truly the most supportive friend ever  
**renjun ** [12:53am] **: **fuck u let me makeout with my boyfriend in peace

🌻

In retrospect, Donghyuck should’ve seen it coming— his crush on Jeno. He really should have.

How could he not? Not after how the first day he met his flatmate, he had shown up all sweaty and in a muscle tee that Donghyuck is 100% sure is not really a muscle tee because he owns the exact same UCSB t-shirt, except it didn’t have two big stupid holes on the sides where the sleeves should be. Judging by the slanted cut, too, Donghyuck is pretty sure Jeno tried and failed miserably to cut it himself.

“Oh, hey,” Jeno had said, opening the door to their apartment, airpods in, hair matted on his sweaty forehead. Obviously back from some sort of workout, or maybe he just likes to look really flushed and showing off his large arms and really toned stomach that Donghyuck can _ obviously _ see through those open cut sleeves (did he mention they were stupid big holes already?). He’s clutching a protein shaker with just water, his iPhone plus, his keys, and the corner of a hoodie all in one hand.

Jeno comes in, reaching up to run his hands through his bangs, and Donghyuck chokes on the can of ginger ale he was drinking.

“Oh shit,” Jeno said, dropping his things abruptly on the couch as he passes it before he’s going up to Donghyuck in their tiny, shitty university apartment, and bringing a hand to Donghyuck’s back, amidst his coughing fit. Jeno’s strong, not that Donghyuck’s really surprised, a la whole _ working out _ thing, but the strength still makes Donghyuck jerk forward and Jeno catches on quickly that maybe he’s Not Really Helping, and he brings his hand back. “Oh fuck— shit sorry, let me get you some water,” he reaches behind Donghyuck to their refrigerator, merely an arms length away in their cubicle of a kitchen, to yank a Brita (a _ Brita, _ Donghyuck thinks. _ Environmentally aware, _he internally coos) out and a glass from a cabinet. 

Donghyuck’s gotten most of his coughing out of the way but the burn still stings in his throat. He grimaces as he takes the cup Jeno’s holding out, nodding in acknowledgement as he downs it in one go. “Fuck. That burned.”

“Are you okay?” Jeno’s eyebrows are furrowed, his lips pursed in worry. _ Cute, _Donghyuck thinks.

“Yeah, yeah,” Donghyuck croaks out, throat still scratchy, but waves his arms like it’s no big deal. “Bad gag reflex. Choke on everything. Even,” he waves his can of ginger ale, “Ginger ale. It’s a curse, really.”

Jeno raises his eyebrows.

Donghyuck looks at him, confusion etched on his face. Then, it dawns on him. “Oh my _ god, _ I didn’t mean— that like, I choke on _ everything _ everything, just like. Like, _ god, _ what the fuck is wrong with me? Can we forget that I just said that? I swear I don’t actually choke on _ everything, _just li—”

Jeno bursts out laughing. “It’s uh, fine. I get you.”

Donghyuck closes his mouth shut, cheeks red, eyes slightly watering, and he’s not sure if it’s because of the drink or if he just actually wants to die from embarrassment at the exact moment. He’s sure Renjun would have a great eulogy prepared for this moment.

“So. I’m Jeno,” Jeno offers, smiling at him, and his eyes form little crescent moons, bright, opposite to the rest of his face, his lips in particular, which are smiling at him shyly. “Your roommate. Um, obviously.”

Donghyuck coughs again. “Yeah, um, yeah I know.”

"Hmm?” Jeno tilts his head in confusion.

“The uh, door,” Donghyuck says, because their university makes them name tags, taped to each apartment door as a way of getting friendly with your neighbors, and he had seen it when he started bringing his things up. “Your name.”

Realization dawns on Jeno. “Oh yeah,” he says, before he’s looking at Donghyuck sheepishly. “Sorry I didn’t get your name.”

“It’s cool. I’m Donghyuck.”

Jeno nods, before, “Donghyuck,” he says, testing out the name on his tongue. He grins. “Nice.”

Donghyuck laughs. “Nice?”

Jeno nods.

“Yeah, nice.”

It’s not until a good week and a half after he's completely moved in and school has started does Donghyuck really say something. 

“So like,” Donghyuck says, looking up from the Netflix show he was watching, sitting cross-legged on the couch. He’s wearing his knock-off snuggie, the one Renjun had made for him by sewing ends of a Gudetama blanket together to make little arms holes because Donghyuck had been whining about _ wanting _ a snuggie but complaining that the designs were just so _ stupidly _ ordinary. Red, blue, grey. A bit of patterns would be nice. It’s Week Two. He should probably get started on reading through his psych modules. “Do you like, do this thing everyday?"

“Hmm?” Jeno asks, yanking his AirPods out from his ears. He heads to the kitchen, like he apparently always does after a workout, preparing for his dinner.

“Like, work out, like everyday?”

Jeno, who’s just gotten back from the campus gym, turns to him in the middle of taking the spinach bag out of their fridge. “Hmm? Oh yeah, well I try to, anyway. Sometimes on the weekend I get a bit lazy and just do stretches out here in the living room instead.”

Yeah, Donghyuck _ knows _. Sunday morning was an experience.

“That’s okay, right?” Jeno asks suddenly, eyebrows furrowing, as he turns to look at Donghyuck. “I’m sorry I should have asked, it’s just that my old roommate didn’t really mi—“

“No, no!” Donghyuck says quickly, maybe a little too enthusiastically, rushing to squash the apologetic look from Jeno’s face. “It’s uh, fine. You’re uh, good.”

“You don’t mind?” 

“No, no you’re good.”

He was, he really was— completely_ fine _, that is, possibly even dandy, but he mentally berates himself for thinking so.

“Okay, thanks. I really like to at least get my stretches in every day even if I’m not out at the gym. Good for my muscles and stuff,” Jeno explains.

“I see. I see,” Donghyuck clears his throat. His _ muscles _. Right. “That’s cool and stuff. So like. Do you exercise, for like, any reason, or…?”

Jeno laughs. “I know, I know. It’s weird ‘cus college students don’t usually make time to go to the gym that much or like. Meal prep or whatever,” he says, and he’s opening the chicken breast_ (seriously, what the fuck _, Donghyuck thinks). “But I like it. Jaehyun, my previous roommate—he lives with his boyfriend now—actually got me on it. We were just hitting the gym like. A couple days a week ‘cus we’re both on the dance team and we were trying to build just a little bit of muscle, but then I saw progress, and then it started becoming routine, and,” he shrugs. “Helps with the stress.”

“Cool, that’s cool,” Donghyuck says. “I mean, yeah, I guess there is a difference between you and me.”

“Have never been to a gym in my life,” he adds, as if just by looking at his noodle arms it wasn’t the most obvious thing.

Jeno laughs, “Yeah. You’re so tiny. Like you’re probably lighter than the weights I pick up and swing around.”

Donghyuck’s eyes go wide, and he coughs again. 

“Are you okay?” Jeno stops grinding pepper on the chicken breast to look at Donghyuck worriedly. “Want water?”

“Um,” Donghyuck turns away from watching Jeno to stare back at the Netflix show. He’s suddenly forgot what the fuck he’s been watching for the past three hours. “No. Nope. I’m— I’m— uh, fine. Thanks.”

“Want me to make you some?” Jeno offers.

Donghyuck tries his best to look at what he’s making from where he’s sitting. “What’s it?”

“Mmm, tonight’s chicken breast and I think I’m gonna stir fry some spinach with garlic,” Jeno says.

Donghyuck makes a face. Jeno tries not to giggle at how Donghyuck looks affronted. “No, it’s okay. I think I’ll just cook some of my ramen after you’re done.”

;

The story goes like this:

Not that Donghyuck was actually surprised, considering Jeno hasn’t really shown anything but being a decent person and a decent roommate, but they actually end up getting along well. 

Which is good, _ great, _ even, because at first, even if Jeno really is nice, after they agree on following each other on social media he finds that Jeno sometimes takes gym pictures with Mark, with the caption _ #swoleboyz _ completely unironically, and Donghyuck wonders if maybe, he really wanted to take the time to invest in a friendship with such a fucking _ local_.

(_Dude, _ Donghyuck had said to Renjun, _ my roommate knows your boyfriend. _

Renjun looked over at the picture Donghyuck had shoved into his face. _ Oh, _ his face is pinched in surprise. _ Your roommate is Jeno? _

Turns out Renjun kind of knew him too, through Mark, and Renjun laughs when all of Donghyuck’s incessant whining about how his roommate is a gym junkie, and likes to eat healthy, and keeps trying to warp Donghyuck into joining him for his healthy dinners start to make sense.)

No matter his questionable social media presence, Jeno actually turns out to be the total opposite of a douche canoe. He belts out 2012 pop songs with Donghyuck while they clean their apartment (_I'm at a payphone, trying to call home, all of my change I spent on you!!!!!!!!! _they belt out, Donghyuck harmonizing with Jeno's horrible pitch, as Donghyuck does the dishes, and Jeno wipes down their kitchen counter), and one time offers to drop off Donghyuck’s paper at his lecture when he forgets to bring it one day. Jeno cooks his dinner for two one day, and soon enough he's roping Donghyuck into a better diet.

(Every night, Donghyuck verbally kicks and screams, whining to Jeno about how _ really this isn't how college students are supposed to live Jen, our blood runs on spicy Shin Ramen and our brains don't kickstart until we've had four cans of Yerba Mate, _but Jeno just laughs, because Donghyuck continues to eat the meals anyway, and soon he stops whining and brightens when Jeno pulls him out of his room and tells him to come eat dinner.)

_ Jeno even went to Muji with me to buy a bunch of essential oils for our apartment _ , Donghyuck raves to Renjun. _ Yukhei hated it when I would turn on my humidifier in our room last year._

(“Dude,” Jeno says, sticking a small bottle up against Donghyuck’s nose in the middle of Muji’s essential oils aisle. He immediately sniffs it, and smells lemongrass and something citrusy. “I feel like this is what lying in a bed of flowers on a hill a la Sound of Music smells like.”

“I really think I just heard Do-Re-Mi ringing in my ears when I smelled that,” Donghyuck agrees.

“Right? Okay so look,” he reaches down in their basket to pull out the accumulated bottles of essential oils they had carelessly dumped into their basket. They got carried away smelling them all, and they had way more than they could afford in their basket. “We can only pick like three. At most. We can’t be denting our wallets before that financial aid hits, Hyuck.”

“But—”

“Uh-uh, Mark’s not here with us this time so I have to be the voice of reason here,” Jeno says sadly.

Donghyuck frowns. “Why do you get to be the voice of reason?”

“Last time we were here _ you _were the voice of reason and we ended up buying a bunch of storage units we don’t even need!”

Donghyuck sniffs. “Fine.”

“Okay, so,” Jeno sets down the basket between them and reaches down to grab the tiny bottles again. The gesture makes his glasses slide down his nose, and he wrinkles his nose to keep it from falling. He fails miserably, and Donghyuck laughs before reaching over to help him. He slides it carefully up Jeno’s nose with his pointer finger, and Jeno looks at him, cross-eyed, grinning. “Thanks.”

Donghyuck hums.

“I really like this one,” Jeno says, holding up one labeled HAPPY. Donghyuck recognizes it as the one they just smelled.

"I want the peppermint one," Donghyuck adds. "My mom says peppermint keeps spiders away, I think."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously I want that one or seriously peppermint keeps spiders away?"

"Seriously peppermint keeps spiders away?"

"Well it's what my mom says," Donghyuck laughs. "Isn't what our moms say always true?"

"You're right."

"Okay the third one, which one should we get?"

Jeno hums. "I was thinking this one?" He holds one up that says RELAX. "I know you haven't been sleeping well, so maybe this will be good for when you're up all night."

Donghyuck looks up at Jeno in surprise. He hasn't been sleeping well—it's true. He didn't know Jeno noticed though, not when they usually part ways at night, and Donghyuck tries to lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as quietly as he can because he knows the walls are thin.

"You know I haven't been sleeping well?"

Jeno turns to look at him, sheepish look on his face. "I hear you tossing and turning at night. I got a bit worried."

_ Worried? _Donghyuck thinks. Something in his fingers tingle, and something in his stomach swirls, like it's brewing something that will surprise Donghyuck, but he pushes it away, and wiggles his fingers to will the sensation of his fingers back.

"Donghyuck?" Jeno repeats, but he’s already leaning down to put the tiny bottle into their basket, hair flopping over his eyes softly. "We should get this one for you. I heard it really helps."

Donghyuck nods. "Okay. Thanks."

(The smile Jeno gives him in return is almost blinding.)

🌠

To be fair, Donghyuck’s not the only one who thinks that he and Jeno are a perfectly good roommate-match made in heaven.

“I swear,” Jeno says, slurping his green juice in the middle of the third-floor study area in their library. He tries to keep the actual slurping sound to a minimum, but the university is on their new Green Plan with all the cutlery, and the straw is some horrible biodegradable paper straw. Not horrible that it’s biodegradable, but just horrible. Jeno can tell it’s breaking easily from the liquid. A _ straw_. “Like, listen, I really prayed to the university overlord to give me at least someone who’s a little decent after I got paired with Jaehyun last year ‘cus, like, I knew no one would compare to Jaehyun. So, you know, just a little decent. At least. But, you know, Hyuck’s _ way _ better than Jaehyun.”

Jaemin raises his eyebrows and looks up from his laptop.

“Don’t tell Jaehyun I said that, though,” Jeno adds. “I whined to him all summer about how I can’t believe he’s leaving me for Doyoung (“Well Doyoung’s his boyfriend,” Jaemin snorts), that traitor, so he promised to buy me boba as a sorry. None of that half-assed Sharetea shit, too. He promised me Happy Lemon.”

Jaemin frowns. “I want Happy Lemon.”

“Dude. Your boyfriend is literally so fucking rich.”

Jaemin sniffs, “So. Maybe I just want Jaehyun to buy me boba.”

“I’m literally telling Yukhei,” Jeno grins.

“He doesn’t care,” Jaemin waves it off. “He thinks Jaehyun’s hot as hell, too.“

“You guys are so weird.”

“Mmmm,” someone bumps into Jaemin’s chair behind him without an apology and Jaemin turns to glare at them with a sigh. “Fucking hate third floor sometimes. So mcfucking rowdy I just know these people are freshmen.”

“We were freshmen, like, 6 months ago.”

“Semantics!”

“Mkay, anyway. As I was saying. Hyuck’s great. Did you know he sliced up some lemon and mint for our Brita the other day ‘cus he heard it’s good for digestion?” He babbles. “He said the antioxidants help with energy for when I work out. Isn’t that so nice that he thought to do that? Like it must’ve taken sooo much work.”

“So much work to cut up some lemon?”

Jeno nods. “Exactly! He takes care of me so well.”

"I mean... I guess?”

"And like after I did my laundry, I was too lazy to fold my clothes because it was really late at night. I was so tired ‘cus it was Wednesday so I had just come from dance, right? Anyway. I was planning to sleep out on the couch until I folded my clothes the next day; but then he saw me and offered to share his bed with me. Isn't that so nice? Like that's so nice."

"Wait, what? You guys shared the bed for the night?”

"Yep," Jeno pops the p. "Also, we have like, the same interests. The other day, he was singing Call Me Maybe under his breath and I was like, _ what do you think of the song she released after? _ and he was like, _ I really like you? _ and I was already super pleased he even knew the song, but I was like, _ yeah, that one, _and he told me that it was like, the peak of pop music, which, you already know, is what I think. Ugh, we even have the same music tastes. He likes Ariana Grande too, but we both agreed we're both mutually mad at her 'cus of how wack she's been acting lately, but whatever. It's so great. He's so great."

“Can we just— Jen, can we just backtrack? You guys slept together in the same bed,” Jaemin says flatly. 

“Yeah,” Jeno says, and he at least has the decency to tinge a bit pink at the thought. “He’s really warm when he sleeps. And his face does this thing. He looks so calm, and comfortable, and just like. Pure.”

Jaemin preens. 

"Are you hearing yourself?"

"Hm?"

"You sound like me when I first met Yukhei," Jaemin points out, looking up from his laptop again to stare inquisitively at Jeno.

"What do you mean," Jeno responds, wrinkling his nose when he swirls his straw in his drink so much that it breaks.

"Are you crushing on your roommate?"

Jeno scoffs. "Of course not? He's just super cool? I just want to maybe live with him forever? But like, just, as my roommate?"

"Yeah that's what my lesbian aunt tells my grandma when she brings her _ roommate _to the family parties."

"Fuck you, oh my god. That's not the same," Jeno replies, kicking Jaemin under the table.

Jaemin yelps and throws Jeno a glare. "You know what, you do you. But when you inevitably come to me five months into your lease—that I may mention, doesn't have any terms and agreements on falling in love with your roommate—when you _ come _ to me in three months and tell me helplessly, _ Oh Jaemin Na, you absolute bastard, I can't believe you're always right, how do you absolutely do it? I am so in fucking love with my roommate, please whip up some poison that we can both take so we can die star-crossed l—" _

"You are deadass the most annoying person I know, dude," Jeno interrupts.

"_ —overs, _ I will be waiting, with an I Told You So," Jaemin finishes calmly. "Then I'll cry out and tell you that drinking poison is not the right answer, not the only way you can be together, and I'll give you some whole speech about how you _ are _worthy to tap that ass, and you will nod and listen and agree and take my advice because I'm such a fucking great motivational speaker like that."

"Future Jaemin sounds like a good time," Jeno snorts.

"He _ is, _future Yukhei is really happy about it."

"How many times do I have to tell you to not say innuendos about the relationship of you and Mr. Big Boy Beefcake to me?"

"Fuck you, you're not that far off from being bigger than him."

"This is all _ lean _muscle, baby."

"You disgust me."

"You flatter me."

"Bro, I'm going to never speak to you again."

"You do realise you would actually be doing _ me _a favor, right?" Jeno asks.

Jaemin throws him the middle finger and puts his airpods back on.

;

They click so easily, so quickly, that Donghyuck always waits for the pin to drop. How can someone just come waltz into his life, so quickly, so casually without warning?

It's a sudden realisation that leaves Donghyuck feeling like something is constantly bubbling in his chest, threatening to spill over. He finds comfort in the way that Jeno smiles at him gently, the way Jeno takes care of him so well, the way Jeno looks at him like he’s interested—always interested when it comes to Donghyuck.

It becomes routine—to wake up and brave the world together with Jeno. It scares him a little; he has many friends, but none that he trusts this easily, this quickly, but Jeno comes into his life like a hurricane that's there to stay, and Donghyuck finds that he doesn't mind at all.

Jeno manages to insert himself in Donghyuck's life like this. _ Donghyuck-Renjun-Mark _ become _ Donghyuck-Renjun-Mark-Jeno-And-Jaemin _, because Mark already loved Jeno, but Renjun comes to know Jeno even more. Jeno and Jaemin seem to be a package deal, not that anyone's complaining, because Jaemin brings the kind of energy into the group that even Donghyuck doesn't have, and soon they're all roping into each other into a tight-knit group.

Even so, Donghyuck thinks the way Jeno and him look at each other and treat each other is different, different from the way Renjun teases Jeno about how _ swole _he's getting, different from the way that Mark chastises Jaemin for drinking too much caffeine, different from the way that Jaemin laughs at Donghyuck for allowing Jeno to corrupt him into a healthy lifestyle when Jeno's never been able to crack him.

Donghyuck and Jeno are different. 

Donghyuck and Jeno are different, because they become grocery shopping together with their pinkies entwined and arguing over what kind of bread they'll eat this week and visiting the other at the library at eleven p.m to coax them back home. They become going to the laundry room together and washing their clothes in the same washing machines and dryers (whites and darks separate, of course) and folding their clothes together, trudging back to their apartment and putting their clothes away in each others’ closet. They become Donghyuck chopping up the carrots into horrible too-big pieces during dinner with Jeno going, _ how the hell are we going to fit this hexagon into our mouths Hyuck? _when he’s dumping Donghyuck’s horribly-cut, too-big vegetables into the pot. They become sitting over said pot on their too-small living room table, cross-legged while they watch Netflix. They become the cheat-day Sunday brunch that Donghyuck bargains for in exchange for a mostly healthy meal week, pancakes and waffles over greasy shared bacon. 

They become all of it, and Donghyuck reasons, that’s just how the story goes. 

Donghyuck reasons this is what happens, this is what happens when you live with someone. It's _ normal _ , it's normal for someone to consume so much of your life like this, but Renjun snorts at him and reminds him that he never did any of these things with Yukhei last year. Donghyuck frowns and says that Yukhei's a cool guy, but he isn't _ Jeno, _ and Renjun looks back at him with a raised eyebrow, and a _ see? _

("He's just like, become my best friend, that's it," Donghyuck reasons.

Renjun replies, "Ouch."

"That's not what I mean, bitch,” Donghyuck says, "You're always my best friend, Renjun, you know what I mean, it's just, d—"

"Different, I know," Renjun laughs. "I get it, I was just playing. I feel the same way, you know?"

"You do?"

"Yeah, about Mark," Renjun answers. "You're my best friend, Hyuck, but it's different with Mark."

"Really?"

"Yeah, of course," Renjun says. "But you know. I'm actually dating Mark."

Donghyuck wrinkles his nose. “Then it’s not the same.”

“Hyuck.”)

;

So, anyway. The story. That’s how it goes.

;

“Party tonight?” Renjun asks after a particularly grueling five hours in the library, and he pushes his laptop away from him like it’s about to shock him.

“It’s midterms,” Donghyuck replies, and he doesn’t have the energy to raise his eyebrows.

“So? I need a fucking break.”

“_You _ need to fucking ace your _ Early Rome _midterm tomorrow.”

“Fuck the Early Romans! The fall of their empire was lesson enough to _ not _ learn from them. _ We _need a fucking break.”

“_I_need to be up at eight for my nine am midterm,” Donghyuck shoots back.

Renjun sighs. “Boring. Whatever happened to fun Renjun and Donghyuck who took on the best parties freshman year.”

“Eight months passed, and the harsh reality of life bit us in the ass.”

“That’s kind of poetic.”

“Who even throws a party during midterms?”

Renjun shrugs, “Woojin, I think.”

Donghyuck pauses, “Maybe we should go.”

Woojin did throw good parties.

“Yeah?” Renjun brightens again.

Donghyuck looks down at his stack of notes. Jeno would kill him if he was being irresponsible, “No, we shouldn’t.”

“Ugh, you’re so boring,” Renjun blanches, and he begrudgingly pulls his laptop back in front of him. He clicks loudly on his touchpad to show Donghyuck he’s annoyed.

“Please?” He tries again one more time, sparing a glance at Donghyuck when the other starts mindlessly swiping through his phone, strung out from all the studying.

“Ask me one more time, and I’ll tell Mark about the _ you-know-what _ incident with _ you-know-who,” _ Donghyuck threatens. He really did want to go, and if Renjun continued to press, he’s pretty sure he would cave in. He sighs. Woojin always has the best mixers. He had to pull out the _ Fall 2018 in the Sigma Kappa House _ incident card.

Renjun lets out a gasp.

“I’ll have Mark beat your ass if you do,” Renjun says, seriously.

“It really is nice and sweet how you think your boyfriend can beat my ass. I really think it’s important to uplift and support your significant other like that, no matter what,” Donghyuck responds, raising his fist in a _ fighting! _manner.

Renjun clucks his tongue, “Forgetting my boyfriend goes to the gym with Jeno now, I see.”

Donghyuck sticks his tongue out, “Fine. I’ll get Jeno to beat Markly’s ass for me, then.”

A hum. “Battle of the boyfriends, then?”

Donghyuck reaches over to hit Renjun’s arm with the stack of _ Intro To Global Studies _notes he has in his hand. “You can’t just say things like that!”

“Fuck you,” Renjun whines, rubbing at his arm. “It’s not like I lied.”

“We’re not,” Donghyuck drops his voice an octave lower and looks around. Obviously no one actually gives a fuck about Donghyuck’s business, especially during midterms when half of them barely even looked awake enough to be in this library, but he still flushes anyway. “Jeno and I are not _ boyfriends.” _

_ “ _ You guys literally hold hands all the time and he waits for you outside your lectures and you _ made _him matching coffee mugs at fucking Color Me Mine. You guys even cuddle and sleep in the same bed when you have your own rooms. Honestly it’s kind of a waste you guys got a double suite when you guys could’ve easily saved on a single apartment, but whatever. You guys spend Sunday mornings going to brunch then going home and taking self-care days except like, with each other, like a sixty year old couple who just cashed in their 401k. You gossip with his mom religiously about him and you know his schedule like it’s the back of your hand. I bet you could even tell me where he is at this moment and where he’ll be in three hours,” Renjun deadpans.

Donghyuck sniffs. “I only know because we have our Google Calendars synced up.”

Renjun makes a noise. “Oh my god, are you serious?”

“Yes, and? I’m not seeing your point here? These are all obviously typical roommate duties?” Donghyuck replies.

“God, I hate gay people so much.”

🌻

“Jealous much?” Renjun greets, swinging his legs over the bench of the lunch table and sitting down in front of Donghyuck in the middle of the quad.

Donghyuck tears his eyes away from where he was looking—at Jeno and a girl (_ Anita _ ? his brain supplies) talking across the field and near the fountain. The girl is laughing wholeheartedly at something Jeno says, and their heads lean forward towards each other like they’re sharing a secret. They look _ cute _together, Donghyuck thinks. She’s the perfect height to bury her face into his chest, small and petite enough to look cute next to his height—but not too much that it’s weird. When she laughs she drapes her body, arms clinging onto his to steady herself, and something in Donghyuck’s stomach repeatedly swirls around, upset. Somehow, despite that, his stomach also feels empty and hollow.

“Fuck you. What?” Donghyuck replies, looking at Renjun who’s giving him a look with a raised eyebrow.

“Jeno and that girl.”

It’s a teasing lilt in Renjun’s voice, Donghyuck knows, but he still can’t help but frown at how transparent he is.

“I’m not jealous,” Donghyuck mutters. “There’s no reason to be jealous about anything.”

“Oh, are we still doing that thing where we’re pretending you’re not in love with Jeno?”

“Shut up,” Donghyuck kicks him under the table and Renjun yelps. “I’m not— I don’t— we’re _ friends _.”

“Then why are you so agitated right now?”

“I just,” Donghyuck waves his hands. “You know.”

Renjun raises his left eyebrow, “I don’t.”

“I _ just _,” Donghyuck repeats, emphasized. He sighs. “I don’t know. I mean we both have different friends in our life that the other doesn’t know, of course. But,” he trails off. 

“But?”

Donghyuck shakes his head. “Nevermind.”

“But?” Renjun presses on.

“It’s stupid, nevermind,” Donghyuck’s stomach twists, because it _ is, _ it’s stupid — this feeling that forms around him, horrible and useless, like a dark secret he keeps buried inside him, shameful _ , _all because, all becaus—

“It’s not stupid,” Renjun responds, and his voice softens. “Hyuck.”

And it’s the way he says it, the way Renjun says _ Hyuck _in the way only Renjun can say it, the way only your best friend can say your name that gets you to open up.

“It really is stupid,” Donghyuck shakes his head.

Renjun waits.

“I mean,” Donghyuck continues, and his face wrinkles, because saying it out loud makes it sound ridiculous. “He knows all the important people in my life.”

Renjun hums.

“He knows all the important people in my life,” Donghyuck repeats. “I mean, obviously he doesn’t know everyone in my life, but he knows the _ important _ones, the ones who matter right, and, and.”

He stops, because he’s rambling and it sounds stupid now that he’s thinking about it, and he hates feeling this way, because it’s so unlike him. He’s never felt this way before, never felt these ropes tightening over his heart, and something unpleasant forming in the deep pits of his stomach, and—

“And?” Renjun asks, and he’s looking at Donghyuck with something akin to curiosity and maybe pity, or maybe it’s just Donghyuck imagining things and feeling bad about himself again.

“And I don’t know her,” he slumps forward. “I don’t know her and they seem really close,” he chances another look at them, and she’s saddled up to Jeno’s side, giggling over something he’s showing her on his phone. Donghyuck tears his eyes away. “And it’s not a big deal, I know.”

“Hyuck, yo—“

“You don’t have to tell me that I’m overreacting and that it’s not right to feel jealous, because I know. I know it’s stupid and it’s probably—_ nothing _, and I, I hate feeling this way, but I can’t help it. It makes me feel like I don’t know as much or that I’m giving more of myself to him than he is to me, you know? But I know that’s not it—it’s stupid, I’m just being stupid, and—“

“Hey, stop that,” Renjun interrupts.

Donghyuck stops. Stops running his fingers belatedly through his hair, stops rambling to try to justify the horribly swirling in his stomach.

“Stop that,” Renjun repeats firmly. “It’s not stupid.”

The creases between Donghyuck’s eyebrows soften, but Renjun’s tightens— furrows, upset at Donghyuck’s constant put downs.

“Jealousy is a valid feeling,” Renjun says. “It’s valid. We’ve been so, so stigmatized to put ourselves down and feel horrible when we feel that way because of how we sometimes outwardly react to jealousy, but it’s still valid. What you’re feeling is valid, Hyuck. It’s a human emotion we all get it. Don’t— don’t try to invalidate yourself over it, okay? It’ll just make you feel worse.”

He leans forward to grasp at Donghyuck’s hand, squeezing, and Donghyuck lets out a breath he doesn’t realise he’s been holding.

“Look,” Renjun says, and his voice is softer, kinder. “It’s not the feeling itself that’s bad, you know. I mean, yeah. It feels bad. Sucks. But it’s okay to feel this way. Feel irrational sometimes. It’s what feelings _ are. _They don’t make sense. The only bad thing is if you externally react badly because of it.”

“Junnie,” Donghyuck sniffs, and the name comes with a feeling that’s closest to fondness. 

That was the beauty of Renjun. It wasn’t often that he and Renjun swayed away from their childish banter, but Renjun was always there, unwavering in his support when it mattered, there to talk about worries whenever needed. He knew when lines should or shouldn’t be crossed, when Donghyuck needed a shoulder or a laugh.

“I’m not here to tell you you’re overreacting,” Renjun declares. “But I am here to tell you that you have nothing to worry about, anyway.”

“What?”

“Anita’s just a group project partner or whatever,” Renjun waves his hand towards the pair, and another glance at them shows Jeno waving his goodbyes to the girl, and spotting Donghyuck and Renjun, a grin stretched across his face. “For one of his seminars. Ran into them with his other partners in the library the other day.”

Donghyuck waves back, smile on his face when Jeno sticks his tongue out at Donghyuck, while walking across the quad.

“Are you serious?” Donghyuck asks, turning back to Renjun.

“Serious as a peach.”

“I— I don’t think that’s how the saying goes?”

Renjun rolls his eyes, “Whatever, how am I supposed to know.”

Donghyuck makes a noise, and pinches the palm of Renjun’s hand.

“You should have told me that before I got all dramatic on you,” he whines, lets go of Renjun’s hand to cover his face in his hands.

“Hyuckie,” Renjun says. “I was serious, you know. Learn from your wise friend Renjun.”

Donghyuck lifts his head to throw a glare at Renjun who’s grinning.

“I’m serious, though,” Renjun calms, after a round of laughter. “Everything I said— I was being serious, you know that, right Hyuck? Those feelings are valid, if that girl was just a group partner or not.”

Donghyuck hums, nods. “Thank you. I know,” he exhales. “I know that now. Just feels dumb to admit it sometimes, you know? Especially over friends. But I needed to hear that. Seriously. You always know what to say, Junnie.”

Renjun laughs, smug look on his face, as he opens his arms like he’s welcoming all the praise. “I am just _ so _ random like that, I guess.”

Donghyuck leans forward to shove Renjun’s shoulder, “Always ruining the fucking moment, god, I hate you so much.”

“First of all, _ ouch _,” Renjun mutters, clinging onto the arm Donghyuck shoved. “Second of all, I’m literally never going to support you again or listen to your woes, you are literally the absolute wors—“

“What is _ up _, my guys, my dudes,” Jeno asks, and he maneuvers his body and limbs to sit next to Donghyuck, immediately pressing his chest against Donghyuck’s back. “What goes on today?”

Almost like it’s muscle memory, he reaches for Donghyuck’s hands, playing mindlessly with it and the rings that rests on Donghyuck’s finger.

Renjun looks at their clasped hands, and at Donghyuck, eyebrows raised. Donghyuck shakes his head.

“Well,” Renjun says finally, looking at Jeno with a roll of his eyes. “Hyuckie over here, is bullying me, as per usual. He almost ripped my _ arm off, _Jeno.”

“Did not,” Donghyuck deadpans, and under the table he hooks his ankle around Jeno’s.

Jeno hums mindlessly, still playing with the ring on Donghyuck’s right pointer finger. It’s a thick, silver one, and Donghyuck finds that it’s Jeno’s favorite to fiddle with. “That sucks, Jun. I’m so sorry.”

“You’re not even listening to me!”

Jeno looks up, frowning. “Yeah I am. You said you didn’t get to eat lunch today.”

“Oh my god, I hate you guys so much,” Renjun says, slamming the book in front of him closed. He shoves the book in his backpack messily. “I hate you guys. I’m leaving. No one ever listens to me.”

He gets up, while Donghyuck’s howling with laughter at the offense Renjun’s taken, while Jeno looks between the two with confusion.

“Did I say something?” Jeno calls, but Renjun is already stalking off towards the science buildings, probably to find his boyfriend. 

“What?” Jeno asks again, brows furrowed, in between Donghyuck’s laughter. He looks like a confused puppy, and Donghyuck refuses the urge to lean forward and pat his head. “Did I say something wrong?”

Donghyuck shakes his head. “Nothing. He’s just being dramatic as usual.”

Jeno hums. “You done with all your classes?”

Jeno knows he is, they both know each other’s schedules like it’s their own, but he asks anyway.

“Yep,” Donghyuck replies. “Home?”

Jeno nods. “Yeah, let’s go.”

🌠

Jeno thinks about Donghyuck so much.

He comes in fleeting thoughts, but ones that come a mile a minute, constantly coming and coming and coming.

He doesn't realise it until he's at the gym with Mark, and Mark's bench pressing, Jeno is spotting him, and Jeno is giggling at Mark's struggle to bench press ninety pounds, saying, _ "You know, I could probably bench press Hyuck. Did you know that? Could probably bench press him. He's probably like what. 110? I could do it. I cou—" _

Mark wheezes, before his arms shake a bit to settle the bar back down, and Jeno reaches his hand out in case Mark needs help. He doesn't, but Mark's face remains scrunched up from the weight.

"Dude," Mark says, groaning as he sits up, clutching at his chest. "You talking gross shit about Donghyuck is distracting me. Literally distracting me, dude. How am I supposed to do anything listening to this shit?"

Jeno frowns. "Excuse me?"

Mark sighs, before he gets up, swinging his towel on his shoulder, as he starts to stalk towards the leg press. Jeno follows behind him with a pout on his face.

"Look, I don't mind you talking about Donghyuck. Cool dude. All friends here," Mark says, and he moves to let Jeno sit down on the leg press machine and adjust the weights for himself. "But, bro. You got it fucking bad. You're _ pining! _"

"Bad?" Jeno splutters, and he pauses in the middle of his first rep. "I don't have it _ bad." _

_ "Bro," _Mark says, taking a swig of water from his Hydroflask. "Let's not act like you don't have the hots for Hyuck."

Jeno completely lets go of the leg press to drop his feet to the floor then, "I don't have the hots for Donghyuck!" 

The machine makes a loud clang, and his voice comes out shrill and loud, and the over-defensiveness of it leaves Mark laughing at Jeno.

Jeno shrinks at the eyes that turn to look at them and he frowns, lowering his voice. 

“I don’t have the hots for Hyuck,” he repeats, but even he knows it sounds weak, and Mark shoots him a look of pity.

“Twenty more reps,” Mark says instead, and somehow the subject change makes Jeno feel worse— like Mark is doing him a favor by letting Jeno off the hook from this conversation.

Jeno just sighs, and props his legs back on the machine.

🌻

Donghyuck knows he’s whipped when he orders a Double Chocolate Chip frappucino with extra cream and a brownie from the campus Starbucks — a treat after the grueling few weeks of ginseng tea, and vegetable casseroles and chicken stir-fry without rice (which, to be fair, is actually good, and Jeno is an absolute cook, but who is Donghyuck if he wasn’t giving Jeno a hard time for the fun of it) and he blanches at the taste of it. Too sweet. Too unhealthy. It doesn’t sit right in his stomach.

“What the fuck,” he whispers to himself. He takes another sip and his face immediately grimaces. 

“Noooo,” he whines to himself before he’s whipping out his phone and pressing facetime.

"Yello," Jeno replies, face coming into view on Donghyuck's phone screen. It looks like he's walking near the science buildings, from what Donghyuck can see.

"Gross, I told you to never answer with that. You sound like you're stuck in 2002."

"It's _ hip. _I'm bringing it back. Also, we were two back then."

"And? You sound like an old white hag who never grew out their glory days of saying '_ Yello?' _into their flip phones while wearing khaki shorts and ugly baby blue polos."

"Is there a reason you're actually calling me? Or did you call just to make fun of me," Jeno frowns, but he's holding his phone at an angle below his chin while he walks, not directly staring at Donghyuck.

"Just came to say that you have officially ruined my life. Congratulations."

"Uh-huh," Jeno replies, not even fazed at the statement.

Donghyuck taps on his phone screen, as if that would capture Jeno's attention. "Did you hear me? You've ruined my life. You've ruined _ me." _

"I see, I see," Jeno nods. "I can definitely see how you coul—_ oops, sorry, _" he says, and Donghyuck sees him side stepping a pedestrian. "how you could possibly think that, and I'm really sorry it has come to thi— what are we talking about again?"

Donghyuck holds up his drink by his face, bringing his other arm back so they both fit into the frame, "This, Jeno!"

Jeno finally looks down at his phone to stare into the camera. He squints. "What is that?"

"A frappucino. Double chocolate chip. Extra whipped cream."

Jeno wrinkles his nose. "That's too sweet."

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "I know. And I loved it."

"Loved?"

"It's too sweet for me now," Donghyuck says, sadly, and Jeno takes a second to process it. "Yeah, you've corrupted my taste buds, Jeno. You've _ colonised _ it. You've somehow voodoo'd my taste buds to like your healthy cooking, and stupid, stupid, _ asparagus, _and stupid spinach apple juices, like what the fuck?"

Jeno laughs and laughs. "Oh my god, no fucking way."

"Me, 'what the fuck is a spinach and apple juice, bitch, im gonna kill you'. My stomach, 'oh my god that sounds good'," Donghyuck whines. "This is what it's like in my fucking brain now, Jen, I blame you!"

"Is that some sort of meme format?"

Donghyuck snaps his fingers in front of the phone. "Jen, keep up!"

"Sorry, sorry," Jeno apologises, "but to be real, I'm not really surprised. You can act all you want that you don't like the food we cook, Hyuck, but I know you secretly like it."

Donghyuck frowns. "No I don't. You're forcing me to eat it."

"You, running into the kitchen while you hear me making dinner, '_ I can't believe you're forcing me to eat this'. _ Me, looking at you, tiredly, _ 'You don't have to eat this, don't eat it if you don't want to.' _ You, already reaching into the pan to steal a broccoli out, _ 'Oh my god, Jen, I can't believe you're fucking making me eat thi--" _

"Oh my god, shut up, okay, I get it!" Donghyuck interrupts.

Jeno grins cheekily into the camera. Donghyuck reddens. He hates (not really) when Jeno looks at him like that -- looks at him like he knows Donghyuck is always soft for anything regarding Jeno. 

(It's true, but he shouldn't _ say it.) _

"Nice use of the meme format," Donghyuck relents, stiffly. 

"Thanks, learned from you."

"Anyway, I'm still blaming you."

"Whatever," Jeno snorts. "I'll be home in like, twenty minutes."

"Twenty minutes? You're closer to home than I am."

"Yeah, but I missed the shuttle and I'm too lazy to wait for the next one so I'll just walk it. Hey, what do you want for dinner tonight?"

"A big fat ice cream sundae brownie with heaps and heaps of whipped cream and chocolate," Donghyuck deadpans.

"Sure you can handle it?" Jeno teases. "Seems like you can't even handle a small little drink."

"Oh fuck you," Donghyuck shoots back. "Just make your stupid broccoli and chicken stew or whatever."

Jeno laughs. "You sure?"

Donghyuck sniffs, looking away from the camera. "Yeah. Whatever. Kinda craving it or something."

Jeno snorts. "Say please."

Donghyuck shoots him a glare, but he thinks the pixels make the glare look a hundred times less menacing, because Jeno raises his eyebrows, teasing glint in his eye, and repeats, “Say please, Hyuckie.” 

“Oh, Jeno Lee,” Donghyuck mutters, dramatically, and with sarcasm lacing his voice. He bats his eyelashes to the camera. "Pretty _ please _ make us dinner so I don't starve to death and die a nineteen year old psych major with nothing to my name except that ugly keychain Renjun gave me for my birthday."

Jeno snorts. "Really, just much cute."

Donghyuck grins. "Was supposed to win an Oscar for my part as _ Pretty Boy #1 _ in Spider-Man but for some reason they cut me out of the scene. It was _ so _disappointing. Only you will ever see my acting talents, Jeno. How sad." 

Jeno scoffs again. "You're so annoying."

"Wow, they hate to see it."

"See you at home, Hyuck."

"See you, honeybun," Donghyuck replies, looking back at the camera to shoot Jeno a grin.

"See you, babyboo," Jeno replies back, like they always do, when saying bye to each other.

;

**donghyuck **[12:32am] **: **ok so what if i said i possibly liked jeno  
**donghyuck **[12:32am] **: **like hypothetically though  
**donghyuck **[12:33am]: in like a hypothetical alternate universe  
**donghyuck **[12:35am]: renjun i am in a crisis.,  
**donghyuck **[12:35am]: well alternate universe donghyuck is in a crisis  
**renjun **[12:42am] **: **it is almsot 1 am hyuck  
**donghyuck **[12:42am] **: **lets not pretend u r sleeping as if ur not sucking face w mark  
**renjun **[12:43m] **: **hmm ok goodnight  
**donghyuck **[12:43am] **: **reeeeenjun  
**donghyuck **[12:44am] **: **renjuuuuun   
**donghyuck **[12:44am] **: **come back king  
**renjun **[12:46am] **: **im only back cus mark refuses 2 make out w me again until u stop blowing up my phone  
**renjun **[12:46am] **: **how can i help u Donghyuck  
**donghyuck **[12:46am] **: **ok. hypothetically. if i liked jeno. what would u say  
**renjun **[12:47am] **: **i would hypothetically say can u tell me something thats at least a little bit surprising to keep me on my toes  
**donghyuck **[12:47am] **: **renjun  
**donghyuck **[12:47am] **: **i mean Like like  
**donghyuck **[12:48am] **: **i Like like jeno  
**renjun **[12:49am] **: **donghyuck we are college sophomores  
**renjun **[12:49am] **: **“Like like” are u srs  
**donghyuck **[12:50am] **: **ok watv. u know wat i mean. In Like W Jeno. the whole 9 yards  
**renjun **[12:50am] **: **i would Still say can u tell me smthn surprising 2 keep me on my toes  
**donghyuck **[12:51am] **: **hmmm ok  
**donghyuck **[12:51am] **: **well non hypothetically Renjun Im In Like W Jeno  
**renjun **[12:51am] **: **hmmm well non hypothetically Hyuck Can U Tell Something Thats At Least A Lil Bit Surprising 2 Keep Me On My Toes  
**donghyuck **[12:52am] **: **thank u so much renjun. truly the most supportive friend ever  
**renjun **[12:53am] **: **fuck u let me makeout with my boyfriend in peace

"Nice outfit," Donghyuck remarks, looking up and down at Renjun's all black attire, odd considering Renjun loves colors—even a bit _ too _much color sometimes.

"Thanks," Renjun deadpans. "Mourning the loss of the steamy night I could have had last night with my boyfriend. Unfortunately I was interrupted by Satan's child."

He slams his salad box down on the table, pulling the chair out to sit lazily.

Donghyuck tells Renjun he's in love, no, not in love, in _ like, _he says, and Renjun snorts at the thought.

"I think it's in love at this point, Hyuck."

"It's _ not," _Donghyuck insists, because there's no way he can be in love, because it's only a crush. 

Crushes are easy to get over, because you like shallow things like the way they smile or laugh or because they grabbed onto your elbow unconsciously and your heart did a random _Ba-doonk! _over it, but being _in_ _love_. Being in love means seeing a future together, and meeting the family, and being taken by the other, and doing things _together, together, together. _Being together all the time because it hurts when you're away from the other.

Investing in a house plant to take care of together, probably.

"I'll get over it," is what he says.

Renjun’s eyes soften, and he says in an extremely tired voice, “Hyuck. You know, this isn’t something you have to ‘get over’. It doesn’t have to be.”

Donghyuck thinks about how Jeno feels like a thousand fireworks in the sky, thinks about how he feels like lit up paper lanterns floating up, up, up, like they’re _ could-be’s, _like hope, hope that’s there for no other reason but to give you comfort.

Donghyuck shakes his head, repeating, “I’ll get over it.”

;

Jeno comes home with two things that makes Donghyuck’s eyes widen and squint, even with his glasses settled on his nose.

“The hell?”

Jeno grins. “Cool, huh?”

“So what are we going to address first,” Donghyuck deadpans. “You look like an e-boy.”

Jeno splutters, “Do not!”

“You’re wearing khaki shorts, a BAPE t-shirt, some Vans, and you’ve got a fucking longboard in one hand, and a succulent in the other,” Donghyuck snorts. “Jeno Lee, resident e-boy.”

“You take that back,” Jeno whines, and he drops the longboard to the floor while he places the plant in front of Donghyuck on their living room table. “I got it for us.”

Donghyuck hums. “That’s nice, Jen, I know it’s a _ longboard, _ but I’m pretty sure it’s only meant for one person to ride it,” he stops and frowns. “ _ You _ shouldn’t even be riding it. Those are death traps, Jen. You’ll be one of _ those _ people wreaking havoc on campus, skating around with no care for all the pedestrians. Absolute chaos.”

“I’m not talking about the board,” Jeno rolls his eyes, pushing the plant forward with a grin on his face. “Came across some sort of fair on the way back by the quad. One of the booths had all these plants!”

Donghyuck freezes, “You got a plant.”

“Yep.”

“For us?”

Jeno nods, happily. “Yeah. I took a long time trying to figure out which one to get, but I decided on this one, ‘cus look,” he spins the pot and there’s two smaller cacti on the side of the bigger plant. “It’s us! Thought we could take care of it together.”

“What?”

Jeno reaches into his pocket, fishing out some receipts he kept lying around, before his hands find the thick pamphlet he was looking for. He pulls it out with a triumphant noise, and hands it to Donghyuck, who’s still looking at him with an unreadable expression. Donghyuck takes it and looks down at it.

“She gave me this pamphlet to take care of it too,” Jeno continues. “Needs direct sunlight, so thought we could put it by the window. Something about not overwatering them, too, but I forgot. Should be all in there, though. We could take turns! Watering it and stuff. And you could even name it.”

Donghyuck doesn’t say anything, and his reaction isn’t what Jeno expects, so Jeno chances another look at him, but the other continues to look through the pamphlet, quietly.

“Hyuck?”

Donghyuck looks up, and his eyes are still unreadable, lips twisted.

“Do you not—not want to?” Jeno asks, confused. He didn’t think it was that big of a deal. It was a cute plant, and he thought Donghyuck would like to take care of it with him. “I just thought we could take care of it together, but if you don’t want to, I could be in charge of i—“

“No, no,” Donghyuck stumbles out, and he flashes a grin at Jeno. The tension that had started to build up in Jeno’s shoulder relaxes instantly, and Jeno smiles at him back. “I want to. It’s cute.” 

He looks down at the pamphlet again. “Says here the window should be an east-facing window. Do you think our window is east-facing?”

Jeno laughs. “I could check the compass on my phone.”

Donghyuck hums in return, and picks up the pot again to admire the plant.

;

**donghyuck:**hey can u pick up some avocados on the way home  
**jeno:** fuck u theyre like $1.20 for one and last time i got u some u left the guac u made w it out and it went bad So Quickly  
**donghyuck:**:( ok mistakes were made but im craving an avocado smoothie rn and u would be a godsend :>  
**jeno:**hmm let me think abt this

Donghyuck laughs because he knows Jeno isn’t really thinking about it, not really, and is probably on his way to the grocery store already.

**jeno: **fine  
**donghyuck: **i literally love you thank you honeybun  
**jeno:**mhm  
**jeno: **hey can you check if we’ve run out of tide pods? i’ll pick some up if we did  
**donghyuck:**mm we still have but can you get some bounce ? we only have like 1/4 of the box left  
**jeno:**kk  
**jeno:**got you some vitamin c 

Donghyuck is halfway through asking if they’re the chewable ones when a new text from Jeno comes through. 

**jeno:**dont worry theyre in those chewy flinstone tablets u like. my moms been pestering me to make sure ur taking ur vitamins :>  
**donghyuck: **love u mama lee  
**donghyuck: **tell her ive been diligently taking my vitamins thnx 2 her so  
**jeno: **tell her urself since ur so obv cosy w her. hmph  
**donghyuck:**ur such a cute whiny baby  
**jeno: **ill tell the person ringing up my stuff that we dont need the avocados rn u think i wont  
**donghyuck: **:>  
**donghyuck: **hey jeno

Jeno doesn’t reply for a few minutes and Donghyuck thinks its probably because he’s paying for their things. Still, it leaves Donghyuck biting his nails.

**jeno:**yes babyboo  
**donghyuck: **omg  
**donghyuck: **renjun says we’re obviously oddly domestic w each other. do you think thats weird  
**jeno: **well we like literally live together ?  
**jeno: **is that not as domestic as it gets

Donghyuck scoffs. Leave it to Jeno Lee to literally be this dense. He shakes it off. 

**donghyuck:**youre right. junnie is dumb and is jus jealous he cant live w mark cus mark signed a 2 year lease w his roommates before he started dating junnie  
**jeno:**blessing or a curse honestly  
**donghyuck: **blessing: renjun gets 2 suffer  
**jeno:**curse: do you know what i caught them doing last week at the shuttle stop  
**donghyuck:**literally dont finish that sentence

Donghyuck doesn’t receive a reply for a few seconds, before his screen turns into black, and a millisecond later Jeno’s name is lighting up his phone. He slides to answer it, biting back a grin. 

“Listen it was so fucking gross,” Jeno says as soon as the call connects. 

“Did I not tell you to not finish that sentence?”

“No listen, if they had their own fucking apartment, I swear they wouldn’t be like this,” Jeno whines through the crackle of the phone. “Like, as in, Hyuck, don’t ever sit on those chairs at the shuttle stop, ok, trust me I was this close to calling campus police on the—“

🌠

The call comes in nearing two a.m, and Jeno almost doesn’t pick up before he remembers that he never heard the front door open before he had fallen asleep. 

His ringtone rings loud and clear, slicing through the comfortable silence night brings and it leaves Jeno a bit panicked. He fumbles through his sheets until he feels the cool surface of his phone, before he’s sliding his thumb across the screen, all while willing his eyes to open up fully.

“Hello?” he mumbles into the phone, having not bothered to check the caller ID without his glasses. He fumbles around again, trying to find the pair.

“Hello?” the voice on the other end crackles, and he tries to quickly place the recognizable tone despite his brain working slower than usual.

“Yeah, hello?”

“Jeno?” the voice asks. “It’s Johnny.”

Oh, right. Sounds like Johnny.

“Hey, what’s up?” Jeno manages to croak out, and he clears his throat, pausing his search for his glasses temporarily. Maybe he didn’t need them.

“Sorry if I woke you,” Johnny apologises. “Look, Donghyuck’s at this party—“

“Yeah, I—I kno— Is he okay? Something wrong? What happened to him?” Like it’s autopilot, his hands start searching for his glasses again, chest tightening and _ god fucking dammi— he really needs to stop falling asleep wearing them, seriously he could break them in his slee— oh, here they are, _and he’s dropping his phone on his bed, not before turning on the speaker, so he can use both hands to slide his glasses on his face.

“Yeah, yeah,” Johnny reassures. “He’s fine.”

“Oh,” the heaviness around his chest starts to fade away again, and—

“Look, he’s just,” Johnny continues. “He’s just really drunk right now? He had a lot to drink and—“

“Did something happen?” Jeno repeats. “What happened? Is he okay? Why did he drink so much?”

Tighten, tighten, tighten.

“No, no,” Johnny repeats, louder. “No, jus—_ shit, Hyuck, c’mon, stop mo — _No. It’s fine, it’s just— can you come down here? Look, he’s fine, but he won’t go home unless you come here and pick him up. He’s been asking for you.”

Oh.

“For me?” 

“Yeah,” Johnny’s voice seems more distant. “Yeah. Can you come when you can? No rush, though. I’m watching over him. Just. I’ll text you my location, alright? Call me when you get here.”

“I— okay,” Jeno agrees, and Johnny is barely managing to let out a _ thanks! _before the line is dead, and Jeno blinks, trying to comprehend the entire conversation.

The party is still in swing by the time his Lyft pulls up to the house, and Jeno has to maneuver his way through a bunch of Toyotas and Hondas by the front to get to the door, which looks like it’s vibrating.

He knows he won’t be able to hear Johnny anyway through the bass anyway, so he sets off towards the living room, hoping he’ll be able to find them on his own. 

Jeno sighs. He’s tired, and the whole point of him not coming with the rest of them to this party anyway was because he had dance club practice tomorrow morning, so he hopes he can find Donghyuck quickly and they can go home. He pushes the sleeves of his hoodie over his fists and clenches at the fabric.

He spots some people he recognizes, waving at Hendery, and Yuta laughing together by the pong table he passes, and he even sees Taeyong laughing alongside Taeil by the kitchen.

(“What are you doing here?” Taeyong had asked, reaching forward to throw an arm around Jeno’s shoulder. “We have early practice tomorrow!”

Jeno snorts, “I could say the same to you, Dance Club Pres.”

Taeyong just laughs, “See you tomorrow.”)

Turns out, he doesn’t have to look hard to find Donghyuck, because Donghyuck finds him first.

“You’re here,” Donghyuck drunkenly calls out when he spots Jeno. He’s sitting with a group of people, some that Jeno recognises, Johnny among them, sitting next to Donghyuck, and Donghyuck’s eyes brighten when he finds Jeno weaving his way through the crowd.

Donghyuck starts climbing over the bodies of people as if he can’t get to Jeno fast enough, and Jeno barely has enough time to hold his arms out, before Donghyuck is tumbling into him, giggling, and warm face pressed into his chest.

“Oh my god, you’re here,” Donghyuck laughs, and he grabs onto Jeno’s arm as he steadies himself. Even after he’s upright, he still leans pressed into Jeno’s side, tight grip that Jeno doesn’t mind. The annoyance that had started to build up by the front door had all faded away. “Missed you.”

“‘Sup, dude,” Johnny calls, and he stands to give Jeno a half hug before Jeno has a chance to reply to Donghyuck. “Told you to call me when you came!”

Jeno’s grip tightens on Donghyuck’s waist next to him, and he leans over to push the falling bangs away from Donghyuck’s eyes as a response. He turns back to Johnny with a shrug, “Thought I could find you guys myself. Too loud in here anyway.”

Johnny nods in understanding, “Sorry about him. He really kept asking for you.”

“S’okay. Where’s the others? Renjun? Mark?”

Johnny shakes his head. “Who knows. Donghyuck separated from them as soon as he came here.”

Jeno frowns, and turns to look at Donghyuck who at least has the decency to look sheepish. “They’re no fun is why.”

“What’s the point of coming as a group if you leave your group, Hyuck?”

‘Whoops,” Donghyuck says, but his face is still warm, and his eyes are still shining, and Jeno knows he doesn’t really feel all that sorry.

“Thanks for watching him again,” Jeno says to Johnny, and Johnny just laughs, says something about good luck getting him home, and to text when they’re safely back at their apartment.

Jeno nods, and he also quickly sends a _ came n took hyuckhome , no worries. text when u guys r home n safe too _to Renjun to assure the other.

“C’mon you big baby,” Jeno says, tucking his phone back into his back pocket, and waving his last goodbye to Johnny before he’s pulling Donghyuck along towards the front door.

He opts out of ordering a Lyft, not sure if Donghyuck could survive a car ride without throwing up. Their apartment wasn’t far anyway, and maybe Donghyuck would sober up into the walk.

“S’cold,” Donghyuck whines, and he stumbles a bit with his feet. He giggles. “I have two left feet.”

“How much have you had to drink?” Jeno chastises, knowing full well Donghyuck always drinks more than he can handle. He manages to pry Donghyuck away from him long enough to pull his hoodie over his head. “C’mon Hyuck, work with me here.”

He manages to get the hoodie through Donghyuck’s arms, but the other is too busy patting at his cheeks to stick his head through the fabric, and with a little more whining, and a little more of Jeno’s pleading, he’s able to stick the red hoodie over Donghyuck’s head, having it fall loosely over his smaller frame. Jeno leans forward to place the hood on his head as well, and he tells himself it’s to keep Donghyuck from the cold, and not because he thinks Donghyuck looks even cuter with the hood on.

“I didn’t have that much to drink,” Donghyuck says earnestly, and they continue their trek back to their apartment, pinkies intertwined. Donghyuck still stumbles, and he inserts too much laughter in between his words, but Jeno keeps him steady and grounded. He admits, “Promise. Only like. Two beers? I think there were shots in between those, though.”

Jeno snorts. “Not that much? Hyuck, your alcohol tolerance was supposed to stop at the two beers.”

Donghyuck sticks his tongue out. “Who are you, my mom?”

Jeno lets go of his hand temporarily to pinch the back of Donghyuck’s hand.

“Ouch,” Donghyuck yelps, and he pinches Jeno back with as much fervor as a sleeping bird, and Jeno just bites back a laugh.

“The party was so fun, Jen,” Donghyuck pipes up instead, and he tugs on Jeno’s pinky like the action itself can convey the feeling. “So fun. I danced so much.”

“Yeah?” Jeno lets out, and he pulls Donghyuck closer to his side and saves him from bumping into a fire hydrant.

He shivers a bit, the wind harsh against his now bare arms, but Donghyuck looks warm in his hoodie, with his cheeks still red and glowing, and his eyes bright, moon reflecting in it, and he finds that he doesn’t really mind.

“Yeah,” Donghyuck continues rambling. “Danced with this guy for a bit. His name was— his name was—hm. I forgot.”

Jeno laughs. “Forgot?”

Drunk Donghyuck is a lot of _cute_. Not super different from Sober Donghyuck, not really, but Drunk Donghyuck has a lot less bite and a lot more _ cute _. Soft around the edges, and Jeno teases him that it’s because his brain doesn’t work as fast to come up with lippy remarks, but Donghyuck insists that it’s because his walls aren’t up as high.

“Forgot,” Donghyuck confirms, and his lower lip juts out into a pout. _ Cute. _“Man, I forgot! He was cute.”

“Was he?”

“Yeah. We danced for a bit,” Donghyuck says.

“Yeah, Hyuck, you told me,” Jeno hums, and finally, _ finally, _he sees their apartment in the distance. 

“We danced for a bit, but then I told him I wanted to stop after a while,” Donghyuck remarks.

“Yeah? He stopped then, right?”

“Yep, he was kinda sad about it, though.”

“Sad?” Jeno laughs— he’s not following the story that well, but his responses humour Donghyuck enough that it keeps him from tripping and falling into himself.

“Yeah, sad,” he repeats. “So I was telling him, no yeah you’re real fucking cute, swear, but the only person I’m trynna _ get down with _ to Gas Pedal is Jeno Lee, you know?”

Jeno snorts. “Really.”

Donghyuck nods fervently. “Hell yeah, all that stretching must mean you can move your hips at some typa level that Gas Pedal requires.”

Jeno chokes, and he has to stop _ himself _ from tripping and falling on his feet. _ Did he— Did Donghyuck jus— _

“Anyway, I told him to fuck off except not really, just told him he definitely was not Jeno Lee and it wouldn’t be the same. He seemed to get it anyway, ‘cus he nodded and was like ‘Hope you get to grind on Jeno Lee to Gas Pedal one day then’, like, how _ nice? _Isn’t that really nice, Jeno?” Donghyuck leans his head towards Jeno, a bit too close, and Jeno tears his eyes away.

The feeling in his chest comes back, tightens, tightens, tightens, and he can’t seem to look Donghyuck in the eyes.

“Jen?” Donghyuck says, and he tugs on Jeno’s pinky again. “Isn’t that nice? What he said?”

Jeno clears his throat. “Yeah,” an awkward laugh. “It’s nice.”

Donghyuck seems satisfied with the answer, at least, because he hums happily in response, “Anyway. He disappeared into the crowd and I never saw him for the rest of the night. What a nice guy.”

;

No one knows how, but Jeno manages to get Donghyuck to go on a hike with him.

Jeno even manages to wake him up at the ass crack of dawn so they’re able to beat the traffic that it takes to get to Paradise Falls, and the whole two hour car ride there was Donghyuck sleeping for half of it, hoodie over his head, not actually believing he was on his way to his impending death.

(Eventually, Jeno shakes Donghyuck awake because he’s bored, and,_ Hyuck I need you to sing Ariana’s part in Best Mistake, Hyuck wake up! I’ll be Big Sean you’re Ariana okay bitch it’s starting ugh lemme restart the son—“) _

Renjun facetimes Donghyuck about ten minutes before they’re set to reach the waterfall, and about seven minutes past the lizard that Donghyuck almost stepped on, but instead he ran away crying, begging Jeno what on Earth He Truly Did To Deserve This. 

(“I eat all the fucking veggies you make me eat and I even ate that stupid chicken breast you made last night only complaining _ thrice, _” Donghyuck cries out. “Why on Earth have you done this to me. Jeno. Do you hate me? Do you not wanna be roomies anymore? Am I a horrible friend? Just tell me. You didn’t have to drag me out here where I’ll fall and a lizard will crawl into my ear and—“)

“Whatyawantbitch,” Donghyuck says in a huff, not really because he’s annoyed, but because they’ve walked so much that he actually, _ physically, _cannot let out anything but one large breath at a time.

“Oh my god. Oh my god, you’re actually doing it.”

“What?”

Renjun calls out to someone behind the phone, “Bitch! Jaemin— we have to pay Mark twenty dollars— Jeno really _ did _get Donghyuck to go hiking with him.”

“What? Fuck you,” Donghyuck says to Renjun, before he’s calling out towards Jeno, who’s walking ahead of him, and, Donghyuck squints, _ is he fucking skipping? While I’m on my last dying breath? _

_ “Jeno,” _Donghyuck whines, and stomps his left foot. A branch below his foot snaps. “Wait for me!”

He hears Renjun snort through the crackle of the phone. “Loverboy leaving you behind?”

“Again,” Donghyuck snaps, wrinkling his nose at the phone screen. “_Fuck _ you.”

He looks back at Jeno who had turned around and was now making his way back to Donghyuck with a sheepish grin on his face.

Before Renjun can reply, Donghyuck watches as he gets shoved by an arm, followed by Jaemin’s grinning face coming into view of the phone screen.

“How goes the being in love thing?” Jaemin says, cheekily, and Donghyuck coughs loudly over him.

“Shut up, shut the fuck up,” Donghyuck hisses at the screen. “He’s coming over. I’ll kill you both and I promise you, Mark would help me get rid of your guys’ bodies like the good friend he is, so shut the fuck up.”

“Who are you talking to?” Jeno says, right when Donghyuck finishes his threats to a smug looking Renjun and Jaemin, sticking his head into the frame. “Oh. ‘Sup y’all.”

“Jen,” Renjun says in lieu of a greeting, and he has a glint in his eyes that makes Donghyuck want to step on his big head. 

“How goes the hiking?” Jaemin teases. “Surprised Donghyuck hasn’t made you piggy back him the whole way there.”

“Actually, he has,” Jeno makes a fake exaggerated moan as he rubs at his shoulder. “My back has been killing me. This whole hike here, I’ve had to suffer under the hands of Donghyuck Lee, all because he simply cannot exercise, simply cannot get his pretty little feet a bit mudd—“

“I fucking hate you,” Donghyuck whines, shoving Jeno out of frame, who’s in the middle of a fit of laughter. “I’ll have you know, _ on the record, _I’ve been walking this motherfucker the whole way. Even touched a banana slug. Bitch. I’m a new person.”

“You’re not supposed to touch the banana slugs, Hyuck,” Renjun wrinkles his nose. Jeno comes back into frame with Donghyuck, wrapping his arm around Donghyuck’s shoulder after he’s calmed down from his giggles. Donghyuck leans into him instinctively. “That’s not good for them.”

“Didn’t we kiss them in science camp?” Jaemin asks, and Jeno snorts.

“Is that just a collective thing we all do? Kiss a banana slug during sixth grade science camp? Is this a universal thing that happens in America? How could we have all done this?” Jeno says.

Renjun snorts. “Pretty sure we all did. Anyway, back to why we called. Hey, can you do us a favor?”

“What?”

“Can you guys, like, not tell anyone, you actually pulled through on this hike? And not post pictures or anything? We’ll each owe Mark twenty dollars if we do,” Jaemin asks.

“Huh?”

Donghyuck turns to a confused Jeno with a huff, “These bitches, our _ friends, _supposedly, made a bet on me! That you wouldn’t be able to convince me to go hiking.”

“Why would you guys make that bet?” Jeno asks, frowning at the pair. “That’s not nice.”

“Ha!” Donghyuck cries out, sticking his tongue out. “Exactly. Thanks, Jen.”

“I mean,” Jeno goes on. “I can convince Donghyuck to do anything. It’s my special talent.”

Donghyuck makes a noise as Renjun and Jaemin snort on the other end of the line. Jeno turns to Donghyuck with a smirk, and Donghyuck reaches over to flick Jeno on the cheek.

“You’re an asshole.”

(The thing is, _ the thing is. _Jeno’s not wrong. Jeno could probably ask Donghyuck to give him the world, and Donghyuck would’ve done it. It’s less of Jeno’s special talent, though, and more of something more crazy; love. 

But Jeno doesn’t have to know this— doesn’t have to know that it’s all because it’s less of what talent he has but more of what he has: Donghyuck’s heart. If he knows, Donghyuck’s scared he’ll keep it hostage forever.)

“Yours truly,” Jeno responds, and his eyes turn into little crescents as he brightens at Donghyuck’s reaction.

“Worst comeback ever,” Donghyuck retorts.

“Hey, earth to you bitches,” Jaemin says, and the pair turn to look back at the phone. “Less flirting, more agreeing with no posting. For all we know you’ve spent this whole day doing Gen Z Asian American Diaspora things! Driving to San Diego to go to a rave!”

Donghyuck snorts. “Mark would never buy that.”

“How would you know? Jeno definitely fits the type to say ‘_ Lemme show you my world’ _ during Martin Garrix.”

“Martin Garrix is good,” Jeno protests. 

Donghyuck turns to him with a raised eyebrow. “You are so not helping yourself right now.”

Jeno shrinks back into himself. “He _ is. _But I’m not the type to go to a rave, or, you know, say weird e-boy shit like that, do I really loo—“

“I know, honeybun,” Donghyuck says instead, a cooing voice, as he throws his arm back around Jeno, because he’s the only person who’s picked up on the fact that Jeno hates knowing that he looks like one of _ those guys. _

He turns back to the pair on the phone screen. Somehow, they’ve become even more pixelated.

“No promises,” Donghyuck says, in a sing-song voice. “All depends on how the rest of the day goes. Honestly, serves you guys right if you’re forty dollars less. Also, shame on you for trying to trick your sweet, sweet, innocent, boyfriend, Junnie.”

Renjun makes a noise of protest.

“Anyway, we’re off to see some waterfall or whatever, so later, losers!” Donghyuck says, and he ends the call before Jaemin or Renjun can respond any further. 

Jeno does end up piggybacking Donghyuck despite Donghyuck’s earlier self-praises, but it’s only because as they continue their trek back towards the waterfall, he switches his Northface backpack to hang from the front of him, and crouches in front of Donghyuck after another particular rant from Donghyuck (something about another lizard that tries to attack him).

“What are you doing,” Donghyuck says, surprised, as he eyes Jeno crouched in front of him, hands and arms going behind his squatted legs, waiting to grab onto something.

“Get on.”

“Huh?”

“Get on,” Jeno repeats, and he rolls his eyes, turning his head slightly to give Donghyuck a look. “Me working out doesn’t mean my calves don’t still hurt from doing this pose, so if you could get on alrea—“

“Alright, alright,” Donghyuck appeases, and he reaches forward to grab onto Jeno’s shoulders and clamber on his back. Something about his footing is off, though, because he ends up pressing his foot down too hard on the back of Jeno’s thighs, and it’s a loud yelp from Jeno before they’re both tumbling to the floor.

“Ow,” Jeno says plainly, rubbing at his leg that landed on a prickly branch.

“This is your fault,” Donghyuck says from on top of him, scrambling back up and blanching at the dirt marks on his printed shorts. He frowns. They were his favorite shorts.

“I’m never doing anything for you ever again,” Jeno cries out, as he reaches a hand out to Donghyuck to get help up from the ground. Donghyuck does, and tries his best to pull Jeno up, but their strength ratios differ, and Donghyuck stumbles forward when Jeno tries to get up.

Jeno rolls his eyes, letting go of Donghyuck’s hand to push himself off the floor, “Forget it!”

“Hey,” Donghyuck frowns.

“You really should start going to the gym with me, Hyuck. Build up some muscle. You’ve got the strength of a broken twig,” Jeno comments, and Donghyuck’s lips twist.

He looks at Jeno now, in his sleeveless t-shirt and glistening sweat on his forehead. Jeno at the gym looking like _ this? Doing pull-ups? _

He swallows and shakes the thought away. 

Donghyuck snorts. “One day, maybe.”

“That means you’re never going to go,” Jeno sighs, and he adjusts himself again in front of Donghyuck without question. Donghyuck grins and climbs on Jeno’s back again, this time without hesitation.

“Exactly right, my sweet pea,” Donghyuck sing-songs, and Jeno grabs onto Donghyuck’s thighs to hitch him higher on his back.

“You good?” Jeno hums out. “Comfy?”

It’s not a teasing tone, rather a genuine type of worry at Donghyuck’s comfort levels, and Donghyuck, _ Donghyuck _—

Donghyuck wills his burning skin to calm down— it feels like his skin is prickling all over and there’s no way to escape, no way to escape the way his skin burns and burns, and the way his heart beats and beats, and he wonders if Jeno can feel the thrum of his chest against his back. He tightens his hold around Jeno’s neck.

“Thank you,” he says into Jeno’s ear, and tries not to feel pleased when he feels Jeno shiver from it underneath him.

“Anything for you,” Jeno says, casually, matter-of-factly, as he sets off towards the sound of water coming down in streams.

Donghyuck’s skin continues to burn, and he decides to embrace the flames.

;

(The waterfall is beautiful. It comes down fast, and if you stay under the falling stream for too long, it starts to feel startling, pinched against your skin, like fireworks threatening to go off.

It feels like Jeno, and Donghyuck drowns in it.)

(He posts a picture of Jeno while the other is busy taking out the sandwiches they’ve packed, unknowing. _ Views, _ is his caption, and when Jeno sees it later that night, he teases Donghyuck that the views the latter is referring to is him, and not the waterfall behind him, and Donghyuck bites his tongue from replying— _ Yes, yes, yes, it’s you. _

Renjun and Jaemin are forty dollars less; Mark forty dollars richer, and Donghyuck doesn’t have the heart to tell Jeno— the picture; it wasn’t for Mark, it was for me, for us.)

🌠

It comes like a Sunday epiphany. 

“Ow,” Jeno says one day when Jaemin and him are sitting in the dining hall during their break, chilling restlessly until they have to go to their two o’clocks. He pauses eating his sandwich.

He taps his chest with a frown.

“What is it?”

“Chest hurts,” Jeno says. 

“Did you eat your sandwich too quickly,” Jaemin responds monotonously. It’s happened to many times for Jaemin to even be worried anymore. 

Jeno shakes his head.

“I was thinking about Donghyuck and then my chest started, like, hurting,” Jeno’s lips stay in a downturn. “Like someone was carving something out of my chest.”

Jaemin snorts. “That’s called being in love, pretty boy.”

Jeno turns to him, and Jaemin isn’t even sparing him a look, playing Tetris on his phone languidly. “I don’t,” Jeno’s stomach twists. “I don’t— I don’t _ fall in love.” _

_ “ _Bro,” Jaemin says in the least comforting tone ever, thumbs moving faster as he levels up.

“I don’t!” he insists, “That’s not who I am. _ Feelings.” _

“Okay, fine. Let’s entertain that idea,” Jaemin says, and he makes a face of judgement at his phone as if he was staring at Jeno. “Let’s say you’re not in love, right?”

“I’m not,” Jeno interjects.

“Okay,” Jaemin rolls his eyes. “Whatever. So. You were thinking about Hyuck before your chest started hurting.”

“Yeah…”

“And what were you thinking about in _ regards _ to Hyuck?” 

“Hmm,” Jeno says. “I was thinking about how if he continues to eat hot cheetos while lying down when he watches Netflix he could choke.”

“Okay, not where I saw this going.”

“So I was thinking I should probably start taking CPR classes or something, or maybe they have those videos on youtube on how to give the Heimlich remover— is that what it’s called,” Jeno continues. “Anyway. I scolded him about it the other night, you know, telling him, _ Hyuck, if those insanely unhealthy and highly artificial chips don’t kill you first, how you’re eating them definitely will, _ and he rolled his eyes but then pouted really cutely at me, you know, that cute pout he does where his bottom lips juts out just slightly and his teeth poke out in between his lips? His lips were so soft-looking and with the hot cheetos it looked a bit plump-er, I guess, because of the spiciness, and he looked at me under his really long, pretty eyelashes, and was like, _ But you’ll be here to save me, right, Jen? _And that’s how I started thinking about how maybe I should actually take those CPR classes, you know? Or at least learn the Heimlich remover.”

“Maneuver.”

“What?”

“Heimlich maneuver,” Jaemin clarifies.

“Oh. Yeah. That.”

Jaemin pauses his game to stare at Jeno, the most unimpressed look adorning his face.

“What? Were you listening to me?”

“Were _ you _ listening to _ you?” _Jaemin accuses.

“Duh,” Jeno says. “I said I was thinking about learning the Heimlich maneuver.”

“Okay, and before that?”

“Yeah, because I really think Donghyuck is going to choke on his hot cheetos one of these days.”

“No, after that.”

“He told me I’d be the one to save him?”

“No, just right before that.”

Jeno’s brow furrows, “His lips were really soft-looking and plum—” his brows relax quickly. _ Oh _. “Hmm, I guess I can definitely see where I could possibly be in love with Donghyuck.”

Jaemin rolls his eyes. “Yes. Possibly.”

;

It all goes like this.

(The story.)

;

“I’m thinking of learning the Heimlich remover,” Jeno says one night, when they’re both sitting in their living room, cross legged on the floor, typing on their computers loudly.

They’ve gone like that for, Jeno looks at the clock, going on four hours now, and his body aches and feels rigid like a stale pretzel.

Donghyuck removes an airpod from his ear. “Whaddyasay?”

“I’m gonna learn the Heimlich remover,” Jeno repeats.

Donghyuck furrows his brows. “You mean the Heimlich maneuver?”

“Oh right, Jaemin said that too.”

“Aren’t you a bio major?”

“Yeah, so?”

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. “So why are you going to learn the Heimlich maneuver?”

“Because I really am worried you’re going to choke on those hot cheetos one day,” Jeno says, gesturing to a bag opened right next to Donghyuck’s laptop.

Chopsticks lay flat against the bag, and Donghyuck picks them up to pluck another one from the bag and into his mouth. _ Helps for when I study, _ he said, when Jeno looked at him weird, _ clean fingers! _

“Shut up, you’re so annoying,” Donghyuck deadpans. “I’m not going to _ choke _on them.”

“The first time we met you told me you choke on everything,” Jeno points out.

“We promised we wouldn’t bring that conversation up again,” Donghyuck hisses.

“Jaemin says it’s a good idea.” 

“Jaemin can also suck my dick.”

“Hey,” Jeno frowns at the implication. “There will be-eth no sucking of my friend’s dick-eth.”

“Stop talking like you’re the Queen.”

“That wasn’t the Queen dumbass, I was going for Shakespeare.”

“Mmm yes, I do think Romeo did say those words before now that I think about it.”

“Joking aside, if you die on me I would really be mad at you.”

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. “I’m not going to die on you.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, you don’t have to learn the Heimlich maneuver for me, Jeno.”

“Hmm, it is a good thing to know, though.”

“Yes it is,” Donghyuck agrees. “But don’t learn it just because of me, asshole. I wasn’t serious about you saving me!”

“Well _ maybe _ if you didn’t make me worry about you,” Jeno accuses.

“Aw, you worry about me?” Donghyuck coos, and he pushes his hands off the floor to scoot himself next to Jeno, laying his head on his shoulder. Their knees knock together and it kind of hurts, and Donghyuck’s hair tickles his neck, but he pays it no mind. 

“Of course I do. When we first met your diet consisted of Shin ramen, ginger ale, and hot cheetos, _ only. _”

“Hmm, that was a bit of a mess, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. I mean obviously, buldak ramen is superior.”

Donghyuck maneuvers his head to look up at Jeno, his nose tickling Jeno’s jaw. Jeno thinks he can easily kiss him like this. “I literally have never seen you eat ramen. Are you even a real college student? Are you like that thirty-year old who pretended to be a high school student for like six years?”

“Yeah, I’ve actually peaked in college and never wanna leave. So here I am. Sometimes you can hear my back crack from the distance.”

Donghyuck hums.

“Your nose is so big from this angle,” Donghyuck teases, reaching up to poke at his nose.

“Your moles are really cute from this angle,” Jeno responds, not missing a beat, and before he even realises what he's doing, he's leaning forward to kiss the mole under Donghyuck’s eye.

Donghyuck stiffens from underneath him, and Jeno freezes realising what he’s done.

He pulls away quickly, and forces a quiet laugh like it’s a funny inside joke.

“Um.”

Donghyuck clears his throat and moves his head from Jeno’s shoulder and moves back to sit in front of his computer again.

“Let’s get boba after this,” Donghyuck says instead, refusing to meet Jeno’s eyes. “Last one to finish the chapter they’re working on pays?”

Jeno lets out a breath of relief when Donghyuck doesn’t mention what had just happened.

“It’s gonna be you,” Jeno says. “Also, I want Happy Lemon.”

“You always want Happy Lemon,” Donghyuck argues. “Can’t we get Gong-cha?”

“Winner gets to decide,” Jeno says, not sparing a glance at Donghyuck, already typing quickly into his laptop. “Maybe you wanna get started if you want Gong-Cha that bad?”

“Fuck you, we didn’t say start yet!”

“This isn’t a race Donghyuck,” Jeno chastises. He leans down to look at the notes he highlighted during lecture. “There is no start and go. It is merely friendly rivalry— support if you will.”

“Fuck you,” Donghyuck repeats, but he too, is already in the midst of getting back to work.

(Jeno wins. He spends the whole drive making fun of Donghyuck, but pulls up to the Gong-Cha parking lot anyway and pays for both their drinks.)

(Jeno might be a little too in love.)

(Donghyuck is, too.)

🌠

Jeno goes through an existential crisis and comes home with a box of hair dye and bleach.

He's gotten an F in his lab and when he visited his professor's office hours to get some advice, Mr. Kim asked him to fix everything in his lab, starting from the beginning, making comments about how it seems like Jeno hasn't really understood anything the class has been doing. Which is definitely not true, because this is the class he puts the _ most effort _in, but he still can't seem to grasp the concepts.

When he gets home, Donghyuck is sitting cross legged on their couch, one of Jeno’s t-shirts hanging loosely on him. It’s way too big for his frame, considering Jeno’s shoulders are a lot bigger than his, and it’s stretched around the neck that Jeno sees Donghyuck’s bare skin in the junction where his neck meets his shoulders. Jeno wants to kiss it so much.

“Hiya,” Donghyuck says, looking up at him from the brightness of his laptop. Glasses sit on his nose. Thin and wired, and they frame Donghyuck's face in a way that accentuates his cheeks. Something blooms in Jeno's chest. Vines that wrap around his heart. “How was your day?” 

Jeno hums, toeing his shoes by their door, dropping his backpack easily too while he crosses their living room quickly to lie down on their couch. He nudges the laptop on Donghyuck’s lap with his head, a silent _ make way, please. _

Donghyuck immediately adjusts his laptop so it’s only resting on his right thigh, and Jeno easily settles his head on his left thigh, eyes closed. 

Donghyuck’s hand immediately goes up to pet Jeno’s hair. He makes a noise, same one he always does when Donghyuck pets his hair, the same noise that Donghyuck teases makes him sound like he’s a cat.

The box of hair dye and bleach are still in his hands, and he holds it up for Donghyuck to see. His eyes are still closed, but he feels Donghyuck’s hand remove itself from his head and grab at the boxes.

“Hair dye?” Donghyuck reads. “_ Blonde? _Bitch.”

“Bad day," Jeno says in reply. "Help me?"

"You're sure?" Donghyuck asks, flatly. "It's _ blonde, _Jen."

"You don't think I would look good?" Jeno asks, and he opens one eye to stare at Donghyuck inquisitively.

Donghyuck's ears turn red at the tip as he makes eye contact with Jeno, and he quickly looks away.

"I didn't say that."

"So you think I'd look good?"

He's teasing, Donghyuck knows he is, with the way he phrases the sentence, the way his eyebrows raise in mock anticipation, with the way he's smiling so bright.

But still, Donghyuck says, "Jen, you'd probably look good with any hair color. It's your face that does all the work."

Jeno's smile grows wider and wider and wider. So wide Donghyuck thinks his cheeks must hurt.

"Are you saying I'm handsome, Hyuckie?"

Donghyuck scoffs, and he removes his hand from Jeno's hair to cross his arms. "As if you don't know."

"Not really," Jeno says.

Donghyuck hums. "Well."

It's quiet for a few seconds, and the soft almost orange light from their ceiling gives Donghyuck a warm glow. Jeno thinks he looks like home.

"Help me?" Jeno asks again.

Donghyuck sighs, and looks back to stare at Jeno, a type of fondness that lets the flowers in Jeno's chest make a home in his heart.

"Of course," Donghyuck says. "Can't let you have a bad dye job," he says, and he's pushing Jeno off his lap, who rolls away with a whine. "People are gonna see you in the halls and turn away quickly at your balding spots and patches of orange hair, and we can't have that. You'll be stuck with me forever because then no one will wanna date you. A tragedy."

Jeno pouts, but takes the hand that Donghyuck offers to bring him to his feet. Donghyuck starts dragging them to their bathroom, hand firm around Jeno's wrist. 

Jeno replies, "I don't mind being stuck with you forever."

Donghyuck pauses, only a second, to whip his head around to look at Jeno, an unreadable expression on his face that makes Jeno feel like he shouldn't have said that.

“Jeno Lee, you deserve a lot better than me for your forever," he says softly.

And Jeno, _ Jeno— _

Jeno wants to say, _ what are you talking about? I think about forever and only see you. There is no forever where you're not there by my side, none where I am not being held by you, none where you're not tending to the flowers that have bloomed in my heart— _

But he doesn't, doesn't have time to say this, to confess this way, because just as quickly as the moment happens, Donghyuck is brightening and pulling him in front of their tiny mirror, and saying, "This fucking hair dye looks cheap as fuck. Last chance before all your hair falls out."

And Jeno laughs and says, "Fuck you, just help me do it already," and Donghyuck shrugs with a smirk on his face, taking out the dye and the plastic gloves.

It's a mess to do it, their limbs hitting each other in their tiny bathroom as they try to maneuver and Jeno has to bend for an uncomfortable amount of time so Donghyuck can get his roots. When Donghyuck finally gets the bleach in his hair, they watch some horrible Netflix show that Jeno doesn't remember the name of, but Donghyuck likes the trashiness of, so he agrees, and listens to Donghyuck make noises and react to the plot. Donghyuck sits on the couch, Jeno on the floor in between his legs, and when he whines and whines about how the chemicals are burning his scalp, Donghyuck runs his gloved hand through his hair, scratching it ever so lightly to ease the feeling.

The hair dye is washed out, and Jeno looks good, of course he does, and Jeno can't wipe the smile off his face when Donghyuck smirks at him and says, "See? Your face does all the work.”

🌠

Sometimes, Jeno thinks Donghyuck loves him too.

Sometimes Jeno wonders what he’s done to deserve something so good. So, _ so _ good to him. 

Jeno thinks this when he's fallen asleep head in an uncomfortable angle resting on their living room table, limbs pulled tight against his body, on top of the keyboard of his laptop, and Donghyuck is there. Donghyuck is _ there, _ and he’s slowly unfolding all of Jeno’s limbs, and shaking him awake quietly, and pulling his glasses off his nose before it leaves a mark, and ushering him into bed (Donghyuck’s, because somewhere when the months together started to blur, _ bed _ was always _ Donghyuck’s). _

Jeno thinks this when they’re walking home from a hangout with everyone, pinkies intertwined, a comfortable silence between them, and Donghyuck always, always, always, softly asks, _ hey, those jokes I said earlier, you know I didn’t mean them, right? I never mean them. You know that, right? _ and Jeno does— know that, and he reassures Donghyuck, _ of course, the jokes, they’re not a big deal, of course I know, _because they’re not— not a big deal, but Donghyuck never fails to ask again and again each time, anyway.

Jeno thinks this when they’re fighting, their dumb fights that you just can’t help when two people live together, and they see so much of each other, and his eyes are blurring, and the tears won’t stop coming, because he’s mad, _ so mad, _ and, _ I’m not crying because I’m hurt, I’m crying because I’m so mad at you, Hyuck!, _ embarrassed, and Donghyuck comes, and wipes the tears from his cheeks, and says _ I know, I know you’re just mad. And I’m sorry. I’ll do better. You’ll do better, we’ll both do better, okay? _

Jeno thinks this when he nags Donghyuck to spray water on their succulent, and Donghyuck mimics his nagging tone, annoyed expression on his face, but does it anyway, and even comes home with another plant, another succulent, because somehow they haven’t killed the first one, and _ Got it from Renjun. We’ve adopted! _

Jeno thinks this when he looks at Donghyuck, and his chest tightens, and the flowers bloom, bloom, bloom, because Donghyuck’s the sunlight that the flowers in his heart need, and because Donghyuck’s the water that feeds them, and Donghyuck is everything— everything that makes his chest their home.

;

There has not been one instance where they have missed Sunday brunch.

Actually. There was one, one Sunday where it happened— and it was only because it was winter break, and Jeno flew back up to the Bay Area to see his family, and Donghyuck was left alone with the honestly _ rock-solid _ pancake that his mom tried to make him, and Donghyuck made Jeno promise to never miss their Sunday brunches again.

“And then I was telling Renjun, yeah, listen, I don’t really wanna hear about how Mark’s ass got stuck inside the dryer, like, can you believe them?” Donghyuck says over a mouthful of buttercream pancake, eyes wide, utensils flying around as he waves his hand animatedly. “As if I don’t know it’s because they were being feral in the fucking laundry roo—”

“Listen,” Jeno says breathing out. “I like you, like a lot.”

And. Well. He didn’t mean to say that. Not really. But Donghyuck was _ there, _ eyes bright, hair soft, small in one of Jeno’s high school track t-shirts, and— _ and _ maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing to say.

Donghyuck swallows his pancake and laughs, and it rings in his ear, loud and clear, and pretty, like bells you hear when you meet your soulmate.

“I would hope so,” Donghyuck teases, stuffing another piece of his pancake in his mouth. “We’ve been living with each other for eight months now. I’d be severely hurt if my roommate didn’t like me.”

“Hyuck,” Jeno stumbles out. “Is that all I am? Your roommate?”

“What?”

“Am I just your roommate to you?” Jeno repeats, and it’s not accusatory, not by a long-shot, more desperate and genuine wonder if anything. _ How does he see me? Does he see me like I see him? Like the way he makes a garden in my heart— _

“I—” Donghyuck realises then that Jeno is serious, with the way Jeno looks at him. He swallows his pancake. “No, of course not.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Donghyuck says softly. “You’re like. My best friend. My favorite person in the world, probably.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” Donghyuck says. “Maybe my soulmate, but Renjun already has that position. Claimed it years ago,” he swallows another bite, grinning. “Sorry ‘bout that. Few years too late, Jen.”

“Ha.”

“_ Platonic _. Soulmate,” Donghyuck clarifies, when Jeno let’s out a blank reaction. “Jen, are you okay? Something on your mind?”

“Yeah,” Jeno shakes his head. “Am I really?”

“Really what?”

“Your favorite person in the world?”

Donghyuck laughs, and underneath the table he wraps his ankles around Jeno’s, tangling their legs together. “Yeah, want me to repeat it?”

“Mhmm,” Jeno says, the tips of his ears red, as he leans down to stuff a strawberry into his mouth, avoiding the glint in Donghyuck’s eye. 

“Jeno Lee,” Donghyuck says loudly and dramatically. He leans back to spread his arms out, wide. “You’re my favorite person in the world.”

“Again?” Jeno requests.

“Jeno Lee,” his voice drops lower. Only for him to hear. “You are my favorite person in the world.”

Jeno grins. “One more time?”

Donghyuck leans forward to poke him in his cheek. “I’m going to start charging you a dollar for every time you make me say it.”

Jeno laughs. “Okay, fine. I’m telling Renjun though that he’s knocked off his number one spot of your Favorite People of 2019 List.”

Donghyuck snorts, and reaches forward to reach for a piece of bacon from their shared plate. “Bold of you to think that Renjun even made it to that list.”

Jeno tries again when they’re walking back to campus from iHop, pinkies intertwined, usual comfortable silence, as Donghyuck’s other hand rubs against his stomach, full, and content.

“So hey,” he says, and he can’t help but cringe at just how _ nervous _his voice sounds.

Donghyuck takes notice of it, too, because he raises his eyebrows, and pushes himself closer to Jeno’s side. 

“Hey,” he responds, like he’s humouring Jeno.

“Hey,” Jeno repeats, and before Donghyuck can laugh at him and ask what they’re playing the _ Hey _game for, he continues. “About what I said earlier. At iHop.”

Donghyuck hums, and Jeno stares hard at the grass next to them, moving along with the wind, content, and happy. Can grass look happy? Well, it does. And Jeno’s a bit jealous. He wants it.

“I like you,” Jeno says, and he tries to say it casually, he does, but it comes out shaky, and scared, and he feels his chest tightening again, and, “I like you. As in. I’m in love with you.”

Donghyuck halts to a stop, and Jeno’s foot lurches forward to hit Donghyuck’s heel, and he’s chances a look at Donghyuck— Donghyuck whose eyes are wide, and lips twisted, unreadable expression on his face.

“I like you,” Jeno repeats. “I like you when you wake me up by yanking on my hair, and I like you when I leave lecture and you’re waiting outside with my peach iced tea with popping boba, and I like you even when you cut those too-big carrot chunks, and even when you take my charger and leave it at Renjun’s place. I like you even when you keep me up all night because you don’t plug in some fucking earphones when you’re playing Battleground, and honestly— honestly, I think I like you all the time. I like you all the time, and I— I just. Well. Well, if you don’t like me back, I guess that’s okay, and maybe I can move out, if you don’t like me, because— that would really be bad to live with me if you didn’t like me back, and maybe I shouldn’t— shouldn’t have said anything, because I didn’t even consider the fact that we _ live together, _and what would happen if you didn’t like me back, and—“

“Bro,” Donghyuck cuts him off. He lets go of Jeno’s hand, and Jeno’s heart— his _ heart _almost drops, down, down down, but then Donghyuck is clutching at his hand, intertwining his fingers, and, “Bro, I’m so fucking in love with you.”

“and I— wait, what?”

“I’m so fucking in love with you that Renjun is this close to wringing my neck because I whine so much about how much I fucking love you. I love you so much that you bring flames to my heart, and you feel like—You feel different. You say my name different, you do, I don’t know how, but you— you do, you say my name, and I hear _ hope _, and, I just—I,” Donghyuck replies, smile growing on his face, eyes bright, light laughter threatening to spill over his lips. “I love you. I love you and Renjun wants to kill me so fucking bad for it.”

“Dude,” Jeno says, surprise on his face, surprise etched over the smile that just grows wider and wider. “Dude, me too. With Jaemin. He said something about how we were star-crossed lovers and poison and tapping that ass and—“

“Huh?”

“—and anyway, that’s not important, my point is,” Jeno rambles on. “When I first met you, I kept saying how much I want to live with you forever. Like. As platonic best bud roommates. And then somewhere along the way, I realised I wanted to live with you forever. When you would do really cute shit like rub ur nose against my shoulder when it was itchy. Or when we would go grocery shopping together and argue what kind of bread we’ll eat that week (“Ciabatta will literally always beat whole grain?” Donghyuck interjects.) Or when you would rub your thumb against my cheek when I couldn’t sleep well. I realised I want to live with you forever. Not platonically. Very much romantically.”

Donghyuck takes one more look at him, eyes soft, looking at Jeno’s bright ones, before he’s rushing forward and burying his face into Jeno’s chest.

“Oh,” Jeno says, hands instinctively wrapping around Donghyuck, as he stumbles back.

He feels Donghyuck’s warm cheeks against his chest, and grins when he feels it get warmer.

“I am. So embarrassed, right now,” Donghyuck mumbles against his collarbone.

Jeno laughs and tries to adjust his body so he can lean down and get a look at Donghyuck’s face, but the latter pushes even more forward, hiding his face effectively. Jeno’s grip on his waist tightens. 

“Don’t look at me. I need to process this,” Donghyuck’s voice is muffled. “Like I know I’ve been dreaming about this ever since you came into our room the first time we met in that stupid muscle tee, and carrying like twelve things in one hand, I mean what the _ fuck _ , looking— looking _ smexy_, but now that you’re actually saying cheesy shit like that we’re going to need to pause.”

“Oh? First time we met, huh?”

“Shut up.”

“Smexy? It’s 2019, who even says that anymore?”

Donghyuck finally lifts his head. “So let me clarify, you don’t want me to call you smexy anymore?”

“I never said that?”

Donghyuck laughs.

“You said cheesy shit too,” Jeno points out.

“So hey,” Donghyuck says to him instead, pulling back to finally look him in the eye. “I do have a question, though.”

“Yeah?”

“Aren’t confessions supposed to come with like, a kiss?”

Jeno chokes.

“I mean, like usually, in the stories, someone will confess and fireworks will explode and they kiss,” Donghyuck goes on. “And you confessed almost,” he pretends to think, “like five minutes ago, and I _ still _ haven’t been kissed, and it’s absolute madness if you ask me, and honestly feel _ free _to cut me off at any moment just to shut me u—“

Donghyuck is flowers. Donghyuck is flowers that bloom, bloom, bloom, in his heart, soft, and pretty, and beautiful and big, a slow, beautiful, cycle, but Donghyuck— Donghyuck doesn’t kiss like that.

Donghyuck kisses like he’s electric, burning, and burning, and burning, and Jeno can’t get enough. He briefly wonders just how good Donghyuck can be with this, _ kissing, _just how many people he’s kissed to be able to kiss this way, but then he’s tugging on Jeno’s hair, and pulling him closer, licking into his mouth, and Jeno forgets— forgets what he was even thinking, forgets because Donghyuck is making noises that make his skin prickle, and Jeno tightens his grip on Donghyuck’s waist, feeling like if he doesn’t hold on, he won’t be able to steady himself.

They kiss, and kiss, and Jeno pulls back slightly to breathe, but then Donghyuck is chasing his lips, biting lightly at his bottom ones, and he leans forward to kiss Donghyuck again, feeling like his lips are burning electric, and it’s not until Donghyuck is clutching at his jaw and laughing lightly into their kiss does Jeno finally pull away, pull away with bruised lips, and unfocused eyes.

“You’re the worst,” Jeno says lightly. “The absolute worst.”

Donghyuck hums, untangling his hand from Jeno’s hair, sliding down, down, down, along Jeno’s side, before he’s intertwining his pinky with Jeno’s again. He leans forward and presses a light kiss to the corner of Jeno’s lip, and it’s with so much fondness it leaves Jeno feeling like he’s been pricked.

“Wanna go back home?”

Donghyuck’s eyes glow, wide, and bright, and Jeno feels sunflowers in his chest spilling, out, and out, and out.

“Yeah,” he says, and he leans forward to press a kiss to Donghyuck’s forehead. “Yeah, let’s go.”

;

Donghyuck and Jeno go like this:

**A.**

"What the fuck happened to you?" is the first thing Donghyuck says when Jeno walks up to his friends, sitting in the corner of Panera. They're all in the big sofa chairs because it's next to the fireplace that Panera turns on, despite having the AC on so high.

Jaemin, Renjun, and Mark look up at the angry sound of Donghyuck's voice.

Donghyuck immediately moves his laptop off his lap and onto the tiny table, as Jeno easily slides onto his lap, dropping his backpack and longboard to the floor. 

"Ate shit," he says, pouting, as Donghyuck's slender fingers go up to to lightly touch the cut he has on his cheekbone and his lip. He winces.

It was his fault, really — all he wanted to do was change the song that was playing in his earphones,_ it would only take like, five seconds_, and then his longboard was hitting a crack in the sidewalk, and he was tumbling.

"_Baby,_" Donghyuck says. 

Jeno smiles at Donghyuck shyly, and he lowers his voice. ”Baby? Stop, oh my god. I'm getting embarrassed. Not in front of them.”

”That wasn't meant to be sweet,” Donghyuck snorts, but he’s touching the cut softly, gesture filled with worry. ”I'm calling you baby, as in you're a _baby_. A tiny child.”

Jeno makes an affronted noise. 

"Does it hurt?"

"Yeah," Jeno says, and if he was being honest, he's fallen enough times on his board that he's gotten used to it, but Donghyuck is looking at him with such worry and care, that he keeps his mouth shut.

"Gimme your Neosporin and a bandaid, Mark," Donghyuck demands, turning to the other.

"How do you know I have Neosporin?"

Donghyuck raises his eyebrow, ”Are you saying you don't have Neosporin."

Mark looks at him for a couple of seconds before he sighs and rolls his eyes, leaning down to grab the sprayable Neosporin from his backpack, and a box of band-aids.

("I feel like that was a jab at me," Mark whines.

"Babe, it's cute that you have everything in that giant fucking Jansport of yours," Renjun assures, not looking up from his notes.)

"Thanks," Donghyuck says, before he's turning back to Jeno with a look on his face. 

"I fucking told you that longboard was not a good idea," Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "This is gonna hurt, okay?"

He leans forward, spraying a bit of the ointment to Jeno's cheeks. Jeno flinches at the sting, and he lets out a small whine that Donghyuck's eyes soften to.

"Big baby," he says, and he's unpeeling the band-aid to put on Jeno's cheek.

"Your baby."

"My baby," Donghyuck agrees, leaning forward to kiss the band-aid after it's settled over the cut. Jeno grins.

"Hmmm, cannot tell if this is them being annoying as shit, as per usual, or if something happened," Jaemin observes.

Jeno and Donghyuck both turn to look at the trio who are now staring at them in curiosity.

"Huh?" Jeno asks.

"Did something happen between you two?" Renjun points between the two of them with his pen, eyes narrowed.

"Whatever do you mean, Junnie?" Donghyuck replies, batting his eyelashes. His grip around Jeno's waist tightens, and Jeno instinctively leans in towards him.

"Something did happen!"

Mark shakes his head, "Nah, they're always this fucking gross."

"This _fucking_ _gross_?" Donghyuck repeats, affronted.

"Babe," Jeno says, leaning down to whisper in Donghyuck's ear. "How about we show them something that's fucking gross?"

Donghyuck's eyes widen, and he turns to look at Jeno — who's absolutely staring back at Donghyuck with an innocent grin on his face, as if he didn't just say what he literally just said. A glint in his eye.

Donghyuck laughs, eyebrows raised.

_ Should we? _the look says, and Jeno barely has time to give him a shrug before Donghyuck’s pushing forward and kissing Jeno, tongue sliding to lick open the other's mouth.

_ "Oh my god," Renjun says. "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.” _

_ "Oh my fucking god we're in public?" Jaemin says, panicked. "This is a fucking Panera?" _

_ "I still can't fucking tell if something happened or if they're just being even more dumb," Mark says. _

Jeno continues to kiss Donghyuck, a slight groan escaping his lips, but he throws a middle finger up to the direction of his friends. He feels Donghyuck laugh against his lips, his hands reaching up to hold the nape of Jeno's neck, a silent, teasing, _ focus on me. _

_ "Oh my fucking god," Renjun repeats. "Dude. What the fuck!" _

Donghyuck nips at Jeno's lips and then Jeno's pulling back, whining. "My cut," he says, bringing his hand up to touch the small cut on his lips that Donghyuck had accidentally bitten.

"Oh my god, baby. Sorry," Donghyuck says, apologetically. He looks horrified that he accidentally hurt Jeno, but his eyes are bright, laughing at their friends' reaction.

Donghyuck turns to the three.

"Never do that again," Jaemin stresses. "This is a Panera. A _ family-friendly _joint."

("I literally still cannot tell if they finally got together," Mark says.)

**B.**

“How did you literally not know I was into you after I kissed your mole? I literally thought I was Found Out. Exposed. Caught Red Handed,” Jeno says one night, breathlessly, between kissing each of Donghyuck’s moles from under him. Under his eye, on his cheekbone. His neck. Donghyuck makes a noise.

“Thought you were— doing it in like a— ‘omg, so cute, like a baby’. Thought— I was getting— cute-zoned,” Donghyuck mumbles, barely getting a word out while he’s moving his neck to the side and squirming underneath Jeno to give him better access. Jeno nips at the warm skin, before he’s pulling back, a grin on his face. Donghyuck frowns at how they’ve stopped. 

“Cute-zoned?” Jeno laughs. 

“Yeah, like. Like when you call someone platonically cute?” Donghyuck explains, whiny. “Shit sucks.”

He reaches forward again, winding his arms around Jeno’s neck, leaning forward to try to kiss Jeno again, but Jeno dodges the kisses easily.

“Well, you are cute. And your moles are cute. Pretty.”

“But not like platonically cute right,” Donghyuck says, “Have we been making out for weeks platonically?” he teases.

“No, definitely not,” Jeno leans forward to kiss under Donghyuck’s ear again, and Donghyuck moans, pulling Jeno against him even more, tangling their legs together. “I am definitely not thinking of platonic things right now.”

**C.**

**donghyuck: **can you get some ciabatta this week please please pretty please

**jeno: **bitch we had ciabatta last week

**jeno: **whole grain Ok

**jeno: **or do u want whole wheat wrap instead? we can make like a spinach and egg wrap

**donghyuck: **ew i want ciabatta

**donghyuck: **spinach and egg ciabatta sandwich

**jeno: **i got the wrap

**donghyuck: **NOOOO

**donghyuck: **WHYWHYWHYWHY

**donghyuck: **arent you supposed to be nicer to me now that we're dating

**donghyuck: **ciabatta or im breaking up with you

**jeno: **wow

**jeno: **"ciabatta or im breaking up with you" what a sentence. so powerful

**donghyuck: **bitch im not kidding

**jeno: **hyuck im not going to let you get heartburn

**donghyuck: **i thought love was supposed to be about compromise

**donghyuck: **u have infiltrated my life jeno lee

**donghyuck: **i eat healthy now and don't even eat ramen except every blue moon. ive lost my sense of identity. i dont know my purpose in life anymore. infiltrated jeno lee. absolutely infiltrated

**jeno: **but ive also infiltrated your heart

**donghyuck: **yeah

**donghyuck: ** u've also infiltrated my heart. i guess 

**jeno: **we'll get ciabatta next week baby

**donghyuck: **fine.,, sniff. get home safe. love you. dont forget my ginger ale

**jeno: **of course love you too babyboo

**D.**

Jeno wakes up to his nose buried in Donghyuck's collarbone and the feeling of fingers running through his hair. He makes a noise of content and moves his head even deeper into the crook of Donghyuck's neck, wrapping his arms even tighter against Donghyuck's waist and pulling closer.

"Morning babe," Jeno mumbles against the soft skin.

"Morning baby," Donghyuck replies. Jeno hears the sound of tapping near his ear.

"What ya doin?"

"Sudoku-ing."

"Boring."

"Mmmm."

They lay like that for a few minutes, Donghyuck mumbling random numbers between 1-9 and Jeno tapping his fingers mindlessly against Donghyuck's side. Eventually Jeno gets restless, and takes his hand back to start poking at Donghyuck's stomach.

"Babe."

"Mmm."

"Baby," Jeno says, pressing down to give a light kiss to Donghyuck's collarbone.

Donghyuck squirms a bit at the touch, but keeps his eyes on his phone.

"I'm bored," Jeno whines quietly, pressing another kiss to Donghyuck's skin, this one a bit higher than the last, closer to Donghyuck's neck.

"Bored people are great at making breakfast," Donghyuck suggests, but there's a smile on his face now.

"Don't wanna make breakfast," Jeno replies. "Wanna eat something else."

He nips at Donghyuck's skin, right in the crook where his neck meets his shoulder, and Donghyuck's breath hitches then.

"Asshole, I'm almost done with this sudoku and I'm about to beat my _ time," _Donghyuck whines, but with each word he sounds more defeated.

"Can't believe," Jeno is trailing kisses along his neck and up his jaw now. Donghyuck squeaks and drops his phone, closing his eyes and lazily lulling his head to the side. "Can't believe I can wake up to you every day now."

Donghyuck snorts, but it's drowned out again by another noise of surprise. "We always woke up together before."

"Not like this, though?" Jeno says innocently, and he uses his leg to push in between Donghyuck's thighs. He grinds lightly against Donghyuck, but continues to kiss innocently along the side of Donghyuck's face; light, feathery, kisses. 

"Jen," Donghyuck mumbles against Jeno’s ear. "You already made me pause my game."

"Mmm,” Jeno responds, and he kisses up, up, up, alongside Donghyuck’s jaw, up his ear, and— he bites lightly at Donghyuck’s reddening ear. He grins against it, laughing lightly when his breathe causes Donghyuck to shiver. Cute ear.

"Just kiss me already," Donghyuck whines.

Jeno laughs, and he leans down towards Donghyuck's mouth.

_ Closer, closer, closer, _and god, Jeno's eyes have gotten so dark, and—

Jeno pulls back, grinning. "Want me to go make breakfast?"

Donghyuck blinks.

"Fuck _ you _," he whines, pulling Jeno by his shirt and bringing Jeno's lips to his.

Jeno yelps, before he's melting into the kiss, breathlessly laughing against Donghyuck's lips.

**E.**

("Babe, you brought the tide pods right?" Renjun says, walking into the laundry room, dragging his hamper of clothes.

It's midnight, so the laundry room is quiet for the most part, except for sounds of a couple of machines running.

"Yep," Mark says, voice muffled carrying his own basket, trailing behind him. "Got the fabric softener too."

"You're the best," Renjun sighs, dumping his hamper on the table. "Let me go check which dryers are empty."

He starts heading to the connected room, to their right where all the dryers are located.

"Mmm," Mark hums in response, reaching into his wallet to grab his student ID card to pay. 

_ "Oh my god, oh my fucking god," _Renjun screeches.

"What the fuck!"

Mark looks up and quickly starts heading over to where he hears Renjun yelling with— _ is that..? _

"What do you mean what the fuck? _ You, _what the fuck!" Renjun screams back.

"Listen, I think we should all ju—" a third voice says.

"What the fuck's happening?" Mark asks.

Mark reaches the room, and turns to see a scandalised Renjun covering his eyes, and a disheveled looking Jeno and Donghyuck putting their jackets back on.

"We weren't having sex you dramatic ass bitch," Donghyuck responds, running his hands through his hair. Jeno has the decency to look slightly embarrassed. "We were just making out. Fuck you."

"Oh my god," Renjun says. "My fucking eyes? Can I open them? Babe, can I open them? Are they done being gross?"

"As if you guys haven't done worse in public," Donghyuck mutters, and Jeno laughs, leaning down to kiss the frown off the other's face.

"Babe?" Renjun repeats. "I hear saliva being exchanged. Please tell them to leave before I report them to the Dean for public indecenc—")

**Author's Note:**

> fin!
> 
> whoo [loud exhale] ok first nct fic. this was honestly only supposed to be a ~4kish fic at most, but as i kept writing, it just always felt like their story wasn't over; that it wasn't enough and soon i was left with this monster of a fic that took me longer to complete!
> 
> i characterised them a bit differently i know, but i jus hold this dh and this jn so dear to my heart and i hope you guys enjoyed them as well ♡
> 
> thank you for reading this, i really appreciate you so much.
> 
> come be my friend!
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/haecns) ♡ [cc](https://curiouscat.me/haecns)


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